"Now I'm not only a Mormon cliché; I'm also a puppy." - Claudio
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Can you tell me about all the things Millennials have ruined?

-Sheebs

A:

Dear Sheebs,

2017-05-20.png

Most importantly, brunch. However it also looks like they also ruined everything, and the election.

Here's a little list of what "everything" means, apparently:

The golf industry

Fashion Yeah, cause there's no fashion anymore?

Bars of soap

The napkin industry 

The movie industry

"The vacation"

The cereal industry DON'T WORRY CEREAL INDUSTRY I WILL SINGLEHANDEDLY AVENGE YOU

Brunch

Lunch

Dinner dates

APPARENTLY ALL MEALS

Light yogurt All other yogurts are fine though

Thanksgiving

American wine industry

Salads

The suit

The hangout sitcom

Trees

The 9-to-5 workday

The car industry

Hobbies Yeah because no one enjoys doing anything in their free time

Democracy 

Costco Really puts the Democracy thing in perspective

Gyms

The American dream That was millennials??

Retailers

Class 

Gen X's retirement savings Probably written by a Gen Xer

Marriage

Relationships and positive feelings in general I guess

The food industry WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN

The junk food industry

Banks

Crowdfunding

Focus groups

Loyalty ...

The Olympics It's over

Cruises and casinos

Credit

The running boom

The NFL HOW

THEMSELVES

THEIR BOSSES

Face to face interaction 

Homeownership

The EU

The wine cork industry Oh no whatever shall we do

Diamonds 

Cable

The oil industry It was millennials

Fabric softener

Home Depot

London's nightlife scene

Call center productivity I honestly lose sleep over this one

THE MCWRAP??

THE CANADIAN TOURISM INDUSTRY??!?

Apparently every industry except the avocado toast industry

All of these things are gone kids, millennials killed 'em all. Sorry.

Keep it real,
Sherpa Dave

A:

Dear Sheebs,

Can I just say that I hate the word Millennial? Maybe it's just because no one seems to have anything good to say about them, or that the generalizations that "experts" make about them never apply to me, even when they're positive, but hearing someone get up and talk about them (or get on the internet and write about them) always makes me cringe.

-The Entomophagist

A:

Dear Sheebs,

But you're a millennial, and you don't ruin things. So your argument is invalid. 

However, people are often the worst, and that's indisputable. Some of my favorite people-ruining-things examples are as follows:

  • Napoleon thinking he could invade Russia in winter 
  • The Trojan Horse
  • When that one announcer ruined soccer with his announcing, so soccer fans ruined him on Twitter
  • I asked a history major if she had any thoughts on the matter, and she told me about the Roman Empire insisting everyone eat off lead dishes and have lead-lined aqueducts, and the whole time that everyone is getting lead poisoning Rome is just like, "Oh man, we're so much more civilized and advanced than all you peasants who don't use lead." Girl please. 
  • Buzzfeed, I'm pretty sure, might be ruining individuality by trying to mass-produce it. 
  • Zed posted this on Facebook during alumni week. It is continuously good. 
    Screen Shot 2017-05-19 at 10.02.04 PM.png
(This last one especially fits with the Kung Fu Panda wisdom: "One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.")

Then, I had to come to myself and ask the hard question:
 
Are memes ruinous? 

I mean, a lot of my entertainment has come from them, and that's basically the only form of communication I have with some friends, and I don't think I could handle it if they were poison, but what if they were? What if I'd been lying to myself this whole time and memes were a millennial invention that has crippled society? Could I live with that? 
 
But fear not, for 'tis not so. And we talked about it on a podcast. It will post soon. 
 
Oh, and the moral of this answer? People ruin things all the time. It's just easier to notice nowadays with the internets and whatnot. 
 
Do take care.
Your friend, 
 
-Auto Surf
A:

Dear Sheebs,

It seems to me as though millennials completely ruin civilizations. I mean, look what a thousand years has done to the Middle East! We should just band together to stop the passage of time, and thereby end millennials for good.

Oh wait, were you referring to the people? 

~Anathema