Dear 100 Hour Board,
How can you tell if everyone secretly dislikes you?
- paranoid that all my friends feel this way
Choose to believe they don't. You'll be happier.
Also, how are they ever going to be able to convince you that they genuinely like you if you insist that they're just keeping those emotions secret? No matter what they do, you'll always be able to think they dislike you. Part of friendship is trust, and so if you count yourself a friend to others then you owe it to them to believe that they like you. Sure, it makes you more emotionally vulnerable in the case they don't like you, but a degree of vulnerability is required for any relationship to work.
Anathema is totally right, but sometimes it's hard to just choose to think a certain thing. In this case, it's helpful to use Occam's Handy Dandy Razor. That is, simpler explanations are generally better than more complex ones. If you believe that all your friends secretly dislike you, then you have to conclude that they're putting a lot of time and energy into tricking you into thinking that they like you. Why would they do that? I mean, if none of them like you, why would they try to make you feel better? That just doesn't make any sense. That's why I think that, if someone acts like they like you, it's pretty safe to assume that they do.
Dear fellow slave to fashion,
Either way, you can join my paranoid club. There are more members than you think there are...or, are there?
The Lone Musketeer
Eh. Seems to me that the odds that somebody secretly dislikes you are probably not terrible, but the odds that everyone does are low. Don't stress it.
As for how to tell, if you're really determined to figure it out, I think Doc Brown was working for an invention to do that in the 50's, but I don't think it ever panned out.