"He's only mostly retired. See, there's a difference between being mostly retired and all retired."
Question #89069 posted on 03/07/2017 11:10 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Person A lives and works in Salt Lake City (they have graduated already), while Person B lives and attends school in Provo. If their relationship were to continue to progress, where should A + B live?

-Asking for a friend

A:

Dear Complement,

My oldest brother was going to the University of Utah (which is in Salt Lake), and my sister in law was going to BYU when they got married. They actually ended up living in Murray, because it was close to my brother's work and to the U, and cheaper than living in Salt Lake. My sister in law took a year off of school as my brother finished his degree, but when she went back to school, she ended up taking a lot of classes from the Salt Lake Center, and then drove down to Provo four days a week. She says it was exhausting, but it only lasted eight months, so there was an end in sight.

~Anathema

A:

Dear you,

My husband and I did something similar for a little while after getting married. He was working in Salt Lake that summer and had been living in Layton before our wedding, while I had been working part time and living in Provo. After getting married, some generous family let us finish out the summer in their Salt Lake condo. My thought is that if there's a car in the marriage, live in Salt Lake because it is going to be way less painful to reverse commute to Provo (especially for a part-time job).

~Anne, Certainly

A:

Dear Person C,

Tally and I were in this exact situation when we were dating. We ended up living in Salt Lake because I only had 2 semesters left and she already had an apartment that was 5 mins away from her work in the Salt Lake area. Things have also worked out so I only need to go down to campus on Tuesdays and Thursdays in this, my last semester at BYU.

Last semester I took Frontrunner down to Provo everyday which was roughly the cost of gas for driving down there but with more time for homework and fewer risks (driving on the freeway during snow storms can be pretty scary). Once I got to Provo I got in my car which was parked in the Provo station parking lot and parked on campus. It was better for Tally to get to work early and go home early without needing to wake up excessively early or have a dangerous, slow drive home during rush hour.

It did make it difficult sometimes when there were study sessions after the time that I normally would go home but it just meant I needed to plan out my day better. Spontaneously staying on campus until 11 to finish a project was no longer possible but honestly I'm glad that I didn't have to do that anymore.

-Spectre

A:

Dear person,

From what I know of the people in my life (friends, people in my program, family) who are in a similar situation, it sounds like living in Salt Lake and commuting to Provo is easier. The only ones I know in Provo who have someone going to Salt Lake make that work by arranging the schedule so she is only going to Salt Lake twice a week by using FrontRunner. It also helps that the situation is temporary, she is going to LDSBC for a two-year program, so there is an end in sight.

Good luck figuring it out!

-Sheebs

A:

Dear you,

My sister and her husband did this, and they also lived in Salt Lake. My brother-in-law only had one semester left, so there was light at the end of the commuting tunnel.

I don't think the situation was ideal for either of them, but for what it's worth they did really love living in downtown Salt Lake because they were within walking distance of two different malls, a movie theater, and a park with a farmer's market. They much preferred the hustle and bustle of the city to quiet Provo.

Love,

Luciana