"He's only mostly retired. See, there's a difference between being mostly retired and all retired."

About Auto Surf:

I definitely don't have all the facts but I've probably got all the feels. Prove me wrong.

Emails from readers are grand. You can send one to me at auto.surf(at)theboard.byu.edu


Recent answered questions:

I think I was a little too cute with my heaven or hell question the other ... — 4 votes
Do you have any alien language movie quotes memorized? -Iwanawanga! (RotJ) — 6 votes
When you're counting how many countries or states you've visited do you include places where you've ... — 3 votes
You all knew the hiding places! Did you ever peek? -Little Brother — 1 votes
The Board knows everything. But do they know why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast ... — 4 votes
We here at the Board are proud to announce the second season of The Board Bachelorette! ... — 7 votes
Okay, so I saw this on Twitter and had to get the Board's answers. Please reply ... — 5 votes
I'm trying to figure out when the statue of Brigham Young just in front of the ... — 6 votes
When was a time you made a bad decision, or perhaps were careless, that ended up ... — 6 votes
Dear 100 Hour Board Wizards, Mages, Shamans and Healers, How would you fight off the beast ... — 2 votes
What makes you feel connected to other people? -Honey Lemon — 4 votes
One thing I noticed while attending BYU was how the number of times a girl gets ... — 6 votes
How would a running of Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis with the current president play ... — 3 votes
Dear Auto Surf, How do you win at Group Naps? -Little Brother — 6 votes
Where are you going - heaven or hell? -One-Wing-hundred-FOR-TRUTH — 2 votes
I submitted a question about two weeks ago. Did it die of old age? Rick — 2 votes
When I was on my mission I became involved in a heated discussion about pens. I ... — 4 votes
How do you personally know that God loves and cares about YOU? I used to think ... — 4 votes
I sometimes wonder whether LDS members who attend/ed BYU-Provo think or feel differently of those (members) ... — 1 votes
What are your summer goals or summer projects (outside of classes and work, although I know ... — 2 votes