"God sometimes does His work with gentle drizzle, not storms. Drip. Drip. Drip." - John Newton (Amazing Grace)

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Question #86747 posted on 05/24/2016 3:55 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's something that surprised you about each of the other Board writers when you finally figured out who they were and/or met them in person?

-Sid

A:

Dear person,

Zedability: I think I may have briefly met Zed in high school. We had quite a few mutual friends and I think someone introduced her to me. I had heard her name before and I remember thinking, "Oh, so this is [Zedability]." And that was it. The time we first met after writing for the Board was at an institute function in Calgary when she had just got off her mission. I went and sat by her and we introduced ourselves and that was kind of it... I didn't really know what to say and was probably super awkward. But I was excited to finally meet her in real life! She was nice, and there were no big surprises.

Tally M.: Initially Tally didn't like me and I could kind of tell (haha, I love you Tally!) so I wasn't sure what it would be like to meet in person. Then it ended up being awesome! I remember being surprised by how easy it was to be friends.

Anne, Certainly: I do remember being a little bit amused at first about how much she loves all things lemon flavored, but I don't really remember my first impression which makes me a little bit sad because now we are really good friends.

The Soulful Ginger: First met as I was walking to Stego Lily's house to build a tower of Oreos. I remember thinking she was pretty cool, and I was a little bit excited that she actually had red hair and that I finally got to see it in person. 

Ardilla: I first met when I went to Mo's apartment to hang out with Tally and meet other board writers that I had never met. I was expecting Ardilla to be a bit odd and maybe hard to talk to but when I got there he gave me a hug and was so nice and wasn't as odd as I expected.

M.O.D.A.Q.: So I was dreading meeting Mo a little bit because I was his mentor and I did a terrible job and basically abandoned him. He was pretty much exactly what I expected though. He was funny. So funny that he made fun of me for being a bad mentor and then I felt fine. Also we all watched 100 Ways to Love a Cat and Doom and Gloom and it was hilarious.

TEN: I first met at a podcast. I remember thinking she was smart. And also short. 

Frère Rubik: I thought he was kind of quiet. But I don't think that's true anymore. This was a bit of a false impression I think.

Haleakalā: I met him when we went with Concorde to put up flyers. I remember thinking he was really kind and friendly and just really genuine. And all of those things ended up being true.

Auto Surf: I don't remember our first meeting... maybe it was at a little games night at Tally's house? Sorry Auto, I don't remember. But I know now that she is the bomb.

Squirrel: I have only met Squirrel once I think. I was expecting her to be short for some reason and hyper but she was actually rather tall and not hyper at all.

Alta: I think Alta had just become a writer the one time I met her and I didn't really have any specific expectations. I remember thinking she was really nice though! 

The Goose Girl: I was expecting her to have bright red hair but then she didn't!

-Sheebs

A:

Dear Sid, Sid, the Science Kid,

I've met (in no particular order) Anne, Certainly, Zedability, Tally, M.O.D.A.Q., Alta, The Lone Musketeer, April Ludgate, Spectre, Luciana, Sheebs, TEN, Ardilla, Frère Rubik, Auto Surf, El-ahrairah (I know he's retired but I'm still in denial), Soulful, Haleakala, and I think that's all.

I officially met most of my fellow writers at a Board meeting, and for some that remains my sole interaction with them. That being so, I'm not sure how accurate this impression is, but a lot of them were a lot more talkative and loud than I imagined them being. I'm not sure why I pictured everybody as being so reserved and quiet, but I did. Then again, I was a new, shy writer newly promoted from probie-ship, so that probably had a lot to do with it. I have had some other meaningful interactions with others, though.

El-ahrairah: I don't really have a first impression of him, but one of my favorite memories of him is when he drove all the way home from BYU on a short weekend just to come and watch me perform in my senior ballet recital. I couldn't really ask for a better brother.

Auto Surf: My first impression of Auto is that she is just super caring. Especially when I was a new writer she kept tabs on me and asked how I was doing. I really admire and look up to her, and have only started appreciating how much she does for the Board since becoming a writer myself.

Alta: I've always admired Alta's answers. They seem so well thought out and researched. I first met her when I stalked her in the library, and I don't think it was either of our finest moments, hers because she rightfully thought she was getting stalked, and mine because I was stalking someone I knew only from the internet. From that point on, though, we've had many a delightful conversation on the bus and I'm looking forward to many to come. She's very nice and seems like she's on top of things.

The Lone Musketeer: I attempted to stalk TLM, but we actually met before I could go through with it, so that was disappointing a relief. She seems really happy and bubbly and I want to get to know her more!

M.O.D.A.Q.: I've met Mo multiple times, although I don't think he remembers any of them. I think he's way funny and clever. But I knew that from his answers, so I guess that's not really surprising.

Tally: Tally was my mentor, and I first met her at the party of a mutual red-headed friend before I became a writer. I knew who she was, though, and I was super excited to meet her. I had to try pretty hard to keep my cool. What surprised me the most was how outgoing she was, although, knowing her more now, I think it's ridiculous that I was ever surprised by that.

Sheebs: I've only met Sheebs once, but I remember thinking that she was just so sweet and kind and a really good hostess. I want to be Sheebs when I grow up!

I've had a couple writers tell me that once they became writers and realized that all of the other writers were ordinary people they were slightly disappointed and disenchanted, but for what it's worth, my appreciation for these guys has only grown since I've started writing and I'm just as star-struck as ever. I consider myself lucky to have joined ranks with them; they're a pretty fantastic group!

-the Goose Girl

A:

Dear Sid the Sloth,

As a disclaimer, I met a lot of writers right after getting accepted to the Board for the meeting where we discussed the Board census. So technically I've met lots of them, but I haven't necessarily interacted a ton with them. And more than anything these are just my first impressions. 

Sheebs: I was shocked that her hair was so long and blonde, because for some reason I was expecting it to be short and brown. Also she was really nice.

Anne, Certainly: We haven't talked a ton, but in real life she's super snarky, which I NEVER would have expected from reading her answers.

the Goose Girl: We became probies at the same time, and my first Board impression of her was that she came across as so cute and friendly and perky in all her answers, and I was jealous that I couldn't seem so cool. The first time I met her in real life was when I was writing an answer in the library and she came up behind me and said, "Are you Alta?" I thought she was some random stalker at first, and then she introduced herself and everything made a lot more sense. I still think she's cute and friendly and perky, so I guess that impression didn't change.

Luciana: I first saw Luciana when we both were doing homework in the JSB. I vaguely recognized her from stalking her on Facebook, but she didn't know who I was, and I didn't introduce myself for weeks. I was surprised that the first time I saw her she really was wearing a Mickey Mouse shirt. She's not making up her Disney obsession, guys.

Auto Surf: She is SO FRIENDLY. Also hilarious. When I got accepted as a writer she emailed me to set up a lunch date so we could get to know each other, and I was really grateful that someone made me feel welcome.

Frere Rubik: He's the first Board writer I ever met, so mostly I was just surprised that he was a real person. The second surprise was that his voice is so deep.

Tally M: She is so down to earth, but also really welcoming and nice. Also, as Frere Rubik pointed out, it's funny that I said she's down to earth, because in reality she really is quite close to the ground.

Spectre: Turns out he's really good friends with someone I know. The one and only time I met him was when I ran into him on campus with our mutual friend, and I was just really surprised that they knew each other.

Ardilla Feroz: Wait, [real name] is Ardilla?!?

Zedability: I was completely shocked that she didn't have dark brown hair. Apparently I just expect everyone to be a brunette, but her real life face went completely against the mental image I had of her. Also when I met her for the first time was when she told most of the writers she was pregnant, so that was another surprise.

The Lone Musketeer: I met her before she applied to the Board because we had a class together. My very first impression of her was when I was trying to say something, but she was excitedly talking with someone else and it was sidetracking my whole comment, and I was trying to figure out how to get people's attention back on me, haha. But turns out she's way cool and funny, and also really smart. 

TEN: Her hair is wicked cool.

The Soulful Ginger: We were wearing the same boots the first time we met, so I obviously thought she had great style. She also seemed like a very balanced person, and super compassionate and kind.

Adelaide: She was my probie, and I think I was expecting her to be sort of awkward the first time she met me, like I was when I met my mentor. But instead she was super outgoing and friendly, and we talked about skiing and ceramics, and I was in awe of her ability to plan the most fun class schedule ever.

M.O.D.A.Q.: He has a hilariously sassy sense of humor, and is very vocal about his opinions.

April Ludgate: She's not actually Aubrey Plaza. This comes as a shock to everyone, I know.

I think that's everyone I've met! We have a pretty cool group of writers right now, and I hope to be able to get to know them better!

-Alta

A:

Dear Cid,

I was surprised to find out that Auto Surf wasn't a shy, quiet person. She's actually super spiritual, very enthusiastic about everything she does and very determined. 

When I met The Soulful Ginger I was expecting someone very serious and somewhat stoic who would constantly ask me about politics. Instead, our first meeting was the Hamilton Boardcast and we got to jam to Hamilton together which was awesome.

My impression of Tally before we met was that she was super nerdy and super nice. Turns out, she is pretty nerdy but not obsessed with nerdy stuff and she really is super nice.

Haleakala introduced me to the Board so my impression of him after I read the Board was pretty much the same.

I met Adelaide at the Hamilton Boardcast, too, and I got a great first impression of everyone there because we also did a lip sync battle after the Boardcast.

I was surprised at how short TEN was but my idea of her being super smart and awesome was confirmed once I saw her book shelves full of awesome books and cool board games and tons of musical instruments. 

I talked about my first experience with Frere in Board Question #86205 which was funny. It was like, adding to the mystery of Mssr. Rubik.

My first and only impression of Alta was awesome when I met her on campus. I thought, she is funny and very excitable. I feel like she would throw good birthday parties.

I met El, Mo, The Lone Musketeer, and Goose Girl at the live Boardcast but that was the only time I've really interacted with them (except for Social Dance 180 with Goose Girl but I didn't read the Board at the time).

-Spectre


0 Corrections
Question #86761 posted on 05/24/2016 3:46 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's the deal with lampshades? I mean, if it's a lamp, why do you want shade?

-Jerry

A:

Dear Kramer,

What does every single creepy, gross, and skeevy location on this planet have in common?

Bare bulbs in a lamp.

-April Ludgate

A:

Jerry,

Here are some possible reasons:

1. In the olden days when lights weren't as strong, they focused it on whatever you were doing (usually reading or writing)
2. They prevent the light from shining directly in people's eyes
3. They were invented to provide HGTV/DIY/Pinterest with cheap and creative interior design solutions

-The Skipper


0 Corrections
Question #86764 posted on 05/24/2016 2:04 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I'm pro-choice, opposed to the seemingly excessive restrictions certain states are trying to put on abortions, pro-access to birth control and sex ed, and pro-supporting women so they can have the support they need to raise a baby.

I'm also pro-law. Current law must be followed. If we don't like the law we work to change it. But current law must be honored.

So why is the idea that women be prosecuted for illegal abortions so terrible? If the abortion is against the law, and the woman chooses to have the abortion, than she ought to face the legal penalties. I just don't understand why there is so much public outcry over a mere suggestion that women receiving illegal abortions be subject to any legal penalty.

-Bored Engineer

A:

Dear Bored Engineer,

From what I learned, it sounds like the outcry is motivated by a few main ideas:

1. Many of the women who would be prosecuted are the same ones who are least able to work on changing the laws, because of low socioeconomic status and little education. They are also the women least likely to have access to affordable healthcare and legal routes for abortion.
2. In at least a few cases, the laws being used to prosecute these women were intended to be used to prosecute providers of illegal abortions or murderers of pregnant women.
3. The outcry is part of working to change the laws, and the people doing the outcrying believe that the laws are morally wrong.
4. Prosecution and incarceration are felt to be cruel, costly, and inefficient ways to change behavior.

This is a complicated and sensitive subject. In a perfect world, there would be almost no need for abortion. People would have the necessary medical and biological knowledge to prevent unwanted pregnancies. They would also have access to the principles of the gospel, especially the sanctity of life and of sexual relations and their place in God's plan. But in an imperfect world people are taught and pressured incorrectly and unrighteously. Laws have unintended consequences. People also make mistakes and use poor judgment. I think that it's important to live the principles of the gospel and to share them, but to share them pragmatically.

Sincerely,

The Skipper


0 Corrections
Question #86756 posted on 05/24/2016 2:04 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

If you could set up any two writers, who would it be?

-Curious

A:

Dear Doctor,

The Soulful Ginger and Ardilla Feroz

-Tally M.


0 Corrections
Question #86758 posted on 05/24/2016 12:04 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why are books always more expensive in Canada?

-One book in Barnes & Noble didn't even list a price; it just said "Price Higher in Canada."

A:

Dear person,

It is because Canada is so cold. Lots of people die trying to get books there so they have to pay the book sled drivers a lot.

-Sheebs

A:

Dear you,

Canadian currency is "worth less" than the U.S. dollar. When doing currency exchanges you would pay more money in Canadian currency than you would in the U.S. Essentially the value is the same, just the dollar amounts change depending on a variety of economic factors. Here is a link to the currency exchange converter on Google.

-Sunday Night Banter


0 Corrections
Question #86750 posted on 05/24/2016 9:42 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Does the church still have a stance against vasectomies? Back story: My husband and I have 3 beautiful children. My first child was 12 weeks premature, and the only way we were able to handle the idea of getting pregnant again was that we had a clear confirmation that we should have the next two. Well after the last one, we thought about a 4th, and we never got a yes for that, and we were pretty sure it is a no. So our biological family is definitely complete (we may adopt at some point). Anyway birth control options are lacking for me. I can't do anything with estrogen in it because I got a blood clot when I did that when we were first married. I have an IUD in right now, and while I am loving the convenience I think the hormones may be affecting me in other ways, including making it hard for me to loose the rest of my baby weight. I have always had a really strong reaction to artificial hormones, including weight gain. My husband is willing to do the vasectomy but we haven't talked about it seriously until today because I was under the impression that the Church is against it. Is it something that we can explain to our bishop and not have it affect our standing? Thanks

-Done being pregnant

A:

Dear Done,

This is from the Church Handbook 2

The Church strongly discourages surgical sterilization as an elective form of birth control. Surgical sterilization should be considered only if (1) medical conditions seriously jeopardize life or health or (2) birth defects or serious trauma have rendered a person mentally incompetent and not responsible for his or her actions. Such conditions must be determined by competent medical judgment and in accordance with law. Even then, the persons responsible for this decision should consult with each other and with their bishop and should receive divine confirmation of their decision through prayer.

I doubt that the Church would take any disciplinary action if you were to have a vasectomy, but I am not a bishop or in a leadership position in the Church, so take that with a grain of salt. I would suggest talking with your bishop about your decision because he would have the best answer for you. I was also talking to some women in my family about birth control options and they said that there are more options than the ones you listed, so maybe going and talking to your doctor about other options would be a good idea. 

I hope that helps!

-Sunday Night Banter


0 Corrections
Question #86760 posted on 05/24/2016 6 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's going on south of campus? Major construction project; upheavals of earth kinda thing; concrete barriers being put up...and what's the deal with those trailers?!

-Professor Curious

A:

Dear Killer of Cats, PhD,

The engineers, driven by hubris and greed and who knows what else (perhaps inadequate facilities) are building a new engineering building on that hill. Will they be tearing down any of the old engineering buildings (i.e. the Clyde, Fletcher, or Crabtree buildings)? No. Again, hubris. (Although, to be fair, I do believe they are tearing down some of the sheds behind the Clyde.)

As far as the trailers go, I am pretty sure they are just standard construction trailers. Why do construction sites need trailers? I don't know, but it seems like every construction job needs them.

-Frère Rubik


0 Corrections
Question #86759 posted on 05/24/2016 6 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's the deal with Aquaman? Could he go on the land, or was he just restricted to water?

-George Kostanza

A:

Dear Georgous,

He seems like a bit of a hypocrite to me.

Aquaman.jpg

(Source)

-Spectre


0 Corrections
Monday, May 23, 2016
Question #86755 posted on 05/23/2016 10:12 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I know someone with the last name Flikkema. Well, I don't actually know them well. Just someone in a class. But anyway, I'm wondering what the origin of this last name is. I've never met anyone with this surname before and it's kind of weird looking.

-My Name Here

A:

Dear Doctor,

It's Frisian.

-Tally M.


0 Corrections
Question #86734 posted on 05/23/2016 10:02 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are some ways you bring more peace into your life?

Peace/Quiet from overload of the information age, for example.

How do you slow your life down?

Not necessarily by lightening your load because sometimes you just can't cut things out, but by psychologically or emotionally slowing things down, like meditating through everything you do


-Where Can I Turn for Peace?

A:

Dear Peace Seeker,

Designate a time to turn off your phone and unplug from electronics, seriously it helps! I try to get away from my phone at least once a day.

I have also found that attending the temple regularly has helped me to find a lot of peace.

-Sunday Night Banter

A:

Dear you,

Personally, it's helpful to plan spare time. During the semester, I'll try to plan a day at least every two weeks where I don't have any homework or other obligations. I'll get as much done as I can in the days before. Then after class, I have no plan, and I can do whatever I want to. It makes that day relaxing, and it also gives me a day to look forward to during busy weeks.

I also find a lot of peace in going for walks. It doesn't take a long time, but it's nice to have free time to just think. Too often I get distracted by my phone or a need to make dinner, so I rarely have a moment of real peace. But going for a walk gives me time where I can get some minor exercise AND really contemplate my life.

If I'm really desperate, I'll turn off my WiFi for a few hours. That way, I can't watch TV or scroll through Facebook or do any of my other typical time wasters. I have to find something more productive to do, even if it's as simple as reading my book.

Love,

Luciana


0 Corrections
Question #86754 posted on 05/23/2016 10 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Would you rather take a job with your dream company (amazing pay, great benefits) but not in the department you want? But they have promised you can transfer departments after 1-2 years. OR take a job at a really good company (but less pay, not as good benefits) in the department you want? I guess you could also try to transfer to your dream company after a year.

-a different decision 2016

A:

Dear Bernie,

Welcome to one of the worst dilemmas of adulthood: making career decisions. Ugh. 

I was in a similar situation not too long ago. Facing choices about dream jobs and dream companies and money and benefits. I eventually chose my current job for a lot of different reasons. I asked myself a lot of questions about what I wanted, and what each choice would mean. I think the most important questions I asked myself, and that you should ask yourself, are as follows:

  1. What opportunities will this job open/close? Will choosing the dream company, but not the dream job make it really difficult to switch roles in the future? What skills will you gain from each position, and how will they affect your future career? Will you actually be able to transfer departments, or is that a myth (I know at my firm it is devilishly hard to switch between departments)? Choose the job that is going to open up the most opportunities for you in the future. Get in a position where you can get the skills you need for the job you want. But I think, more importantly, take the position that will get you a variety of skills that will open up opportunities for not only the job you want but other potential future jobs. 
  2. Will you be happy? Let me share a little personal experience with you. Before I got my current job at Goldman Sachs, I was an intern in a different division in the firm. I was miserable as an intern. I was doing a job which I found to be dreadfully boring. I didn't feel like my job really made an impact on the company or people. And to make it all worse, I was doing work that simply didn't engage my mind. However, I did know that I wanted to switch into my current division. I knew there I would not be bored, my mind would be engaged, and I could really make an impact on the firm. However, I knew when the offer came, if they only offered me a position in the division I interned in, I would not take it. I wouldn't take it, in spite of the benefits and pay, in spite of the potential resume power. I knew I would be miserable in that position. So, dear reader, I advise you to make the decision that will bring you the most daily contentment with your life. If you don't know what that will be, try to talk to people in both positions you are considering. Talk to as many people as possible. Decide what it is you need in a job to make you happy. Let that be a guide to your career. 
One last thing. If you are not praying about this situation, then you absolutely should be. To be honest, prayer and revelation eventually drove my decision to accept my current job. The Lord knows better what opportunities will open up in the future at each of these positions. He also knows what will make you happiest. Seek any guidance he has for your on this subject, and trust in him. 
 
Also, if you would like to talk about this more, feel free to email me at the.soulful.ginger@theboard.byu.edu.
 
Sincerely,
The Soulful Ginger
 
P.S. I've been told several times that you can't really make a career mistake in your 20s. While I don't think that is entirely true, I do think that there is a lot more flexibility in what you can and cannot do concerning your career at this time in your life.
 
A:

Dear you,

I would chose my dream company, hands down.

First of all, the pay and benefits are super important, and since they're better at your dream company, that seems like a no-brainer.

Second, two years isn't really all that long. It could take even less time than that to transfer.

Third, it would probably be good for you to gain some skills from outside your chosen department. Learning to be excellent in another field can only serve to increase your value to the company, and make you more marketable in case you decide to take your career in another direction down the road.

Love,

Luciana

A:

Dear Decision,

I know nothing about the people or companies involved in your decision, but I would urge you to be cautious about accepting non-contractual promises as a major condition of employment, especially when they deal significantly with your intended career direction. Even in the best of cases, well-intentioned people may not have the power to keep some promises, or some other circumstance or policy may arise that would prevent them from keeping good on their word. In the worst case, they may be lying or unwilling to keep a promise that may cause them some inconvenience down the road. Again, I don't know the people or company, and I don't want to sow seeds of doubt; just be careful hanging your hat on something that may or may not be guaranteed. It sounds like you have two really great career opportunities to choose from and I wish you the best in whichever you select.

Sincerely,

The Skipper


0 Corrections
Question #86647 posted on 05/23/2016 9:55 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

i find a lot of hate for sociopaths. Maybe they deserve it. And obviously some are down right evil. But can a sociopath be an ok person? Is there a continuum they are on? Can they be rehabilitated?

~gas light

A:

Dear ___________________,

Psychopaths/sociopaths have a mental disorder called antisocial personality disorder. This disorder is characterized by symptoms like failure to obey laws and norms; lying, deception, and manipulation, for profit or self-amusement; impulsive behavior; irritability and aggression; blatantly disregards safety of self and others; irresponsibility; and lack of remorse for actions. The most important hallmark of APD is a lack of empathy. To be diagnosed, one would also have to be at least 18 and have to have exhibited evidence of conduct disorder by age 15. People with conduct disorder exhibit behaviors like aggression to people and animals, theft, deceitfulness, destruction of property, and serious violations of rules.

As you can tell from those lists, you could say that people with antisocial personality disorder are bad people because they are rather awful at exhibiting behaviors that we associate with good people, such as genuine compassion and integrity. However, most people with APD are not murderers (and most murderers don't have antisocial personality disorder). Most probably aren't even criminals. Many are functioning members of society. It would be possible to not even realize that someone has APD and to not be harmed by them.

So are they "bad" people? Not necessarily. Does APD exist on a spectrum? Most certainly. Would people with APD generally make good partners or close friends? Probably not, if you value genuine compassion or empathy. Is their condition their fault? Certainly not.

You might be interested in this personal account by a Mormon woman who identifies as a sociopath.

At this time, there are no effective treatments for people with APD. If one has no empathy, it is (currently) impossible to motivate them to change. I doubt this will change any time soon.

- The Black Sheep


0 Corrections
Question #86752 posted on 05/23/2016 5:54 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
I want to up my snapchat game because I love seeing other poeples' stories. Do you guys have any snaps that you'd recommend? I remember BYU used to have one but i don't get it anymore :(

-My Name Here

A:

Dear Doctor,

Hank Green's (hankgre) snap stories are fairly entertaining. I don't really do snap stories though, so I don't have much more than that.

-Tally M.


0 Corrections
Question #86751 posted on 05/23/2016 5:30 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

When is it ok to offer to give a blessing, and when should you wait for someone to ask for one?

-Bless You

A:

Dear Salud,

My thoughts are that you should follow the Spirit. If you feel like the person needs a blessing you can suggest they get one, in case they hadn't thought about it. But if you offer to give a blessing, be ok if they say no. Just make sure they know you are offering it out of love. 

I think a lot of people believe blessings can only be given in dire situations of extreme sickness or duress. That's not exclusively true. A priesthood blessing, at the risk of being redundant, is a blessing. When people are going through troubles, who doesn't want a blessing? In my opinion, you should get priesthood blessings often. When I get a blessing, it reminds me that God really is looking out for me and knows my future. God wants me to do great things and will help me achieve those things. If someone's problem is spiritual, mental, stress, work, self-doubt, fear, or anything related to these things, it is absolutely appropriate to get a blessing for help.

So if you are the person wants to help, just be there to help. You might be afraid of being like the lady in SNB's story but I don't know many people like that. I have offered blessings to my home teachees before and they said no because they didn't feel like they needed it at the time. No one was offended and no one was hurt. So if you feel like you should offer a blessing, I say, go ahead and offer it.

-Spectre

A:

Dear Doctor,

I agree a lot with Spectre's second paragraph. I had never gotten a blessing outside of being super sick and father's blessings until I came to college, and being more willing to get blessings has been really helpful to me. I have actually been prompted to get blessings even when I didn't think I needed one. So, when you're prompted is a good time to ask someone.

-Tally M.

A:

Dear you,

I try to avoid emotionally charged situations, thus sometimes I'm reluctant to ask my own father for a blessing. I've only been brave enough to ask my home teachers once, and that was when I was having oral surgery. So honestly, even if I didn't feel like I needed one, I would probably say yes if someone close to me offered. I think it's a reflection of the fact that you care about the person.

Don't be offended if they say no. But I think most people could benefit from being blessed more often, and I'm sure lots of people don't feel comfortable asking.

Love,

Luciana


0 Corrections
Question #86749 posted on 05/23/2016 2:06 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Board Question #86319. Will you air The Board Bachelorette this summer?

-Dallin

A:

Dear Doctor,

Due to budget cuts, no.

-Tally M.

A:

Dear Dallin,

Considering pretty much all of us are either dating each other or someone else, I'm not sure how well this would work. 

-Adelaide


0 Corrections
Question #86739 posted on 05/23/2016 9:58 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are your favorite sites to shop online for shoes? I'm particularly looking for heels at the moment.

-Reader

A:

Dear Reader,

Zappos is one of my favorites. They are highly customer friendly. They offer free returns within 365 days of your purchase. They pay for the return shipping, and they have a wide selection of brands and shoes. I have ordered from them multiple times and I have come away happy with every purchase. 

Happy shopping!

-Sunday Night Banter


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Question #86731 posted on 05/23/2016 8:18 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

How did the USGA group come to be? What is its history up until and including moving off campus? Explanations of why they did what they did are appreciated as well.

-AGSU

A:

Dear you,

I asked Addison Jenkins, the current USGA president, and he checked with some of the previous USGA presidents and came up with the following information:

Following the work of BYU students and administrators to update the Honor Code to allow students to be open about their sexual orientation in 2007, LGBTQ/SSA students began meeting informally. In 2010, Understanding Same Gender Attraction (USGA) grew out of these associations, and began meeting on campus with the knowledge of President Samuelson and Vice President of Student Life Scharman. In 2011, the Honor Code was updated again, removing language about advocacy of homosexual behavior which further expanded the dialogues LGBTQ/SSA students at BYU were allowed to have. While USGA was not sponsored or endorsed by BYU, it met in various locations on campus including the JKB, TMCB, and Law building.

In 2012, USGA released their "It Gets Better" video on YouTube which quickly garnered hundreds of thousands of views. The sociology department had long been planning a panel of gay and lesbian BYU students that happened to fall a few weeks after the release of the video. Some students on the panel were involved with USGA, and the event received unprecedented coverage and some controversy - it was met with an overflow crowd in a MARB auditorium of hundreds of students and non-students alike.Throughout the rest of the year, multiple conversations developed between concerned Utah citizens, the leadership of the LDS Church and BYU, prominent Utah LGBT advocates, and the leadership of USGA.

In January of 2013, USGA began meeting at the Provo public library with funding secured by a gay philanthropist and BYU alumnus. USGA continues its work to save and improve the lives of LGBTQ/SSA students at BYU and meets regularly with various BYU administrators. They hold weekly meetings 7pm at the Provo library that rotate in focus on education, faith and service, community, history, and outreach, and hold numerous social activities each month. The leadership team of USGA averages around 40 LGBTQ/SSA and straight ally students, along with a faculty advisory board of current BYU professors.

-Zedability


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Sunday, May 22, 2016
Question #86743 posted on 05/22/2016 9:43 p.m.
Q:

Dearest writers,

If you were a high school valedictorian this year, what would you tell your class? What do you feel like high school seniors these days need to hear? Would that be different from what you would have said if you really could have given a speech at your high school graduation? Assume that your peers are remarkably attentive, so they'll listen if you want them to.

LW

A:

Dear Lovely Waffles,

I'd really encourage them to keep learning and discovering, to seek out information from lots of different sources. I'd encourage them to study out things from multiple perspectives. I'd ask them to try and learn about things not necessarily in their normal sphere. 

Whereas when I spoke at my high school graduation, my remarks were more focused on striving for greatness and seeking to rise above the relatively humble circumstances of our area. I talked about Homer Hickam and John Huntsman, both of whom came from small, obscure towns and went on to do great things. So many kids just attend the local college for a couple of years after high school and then don't really do anything. Also there was this girl in my Spanish class who said she had no real desire to ever leave the state of Utah, and that thought gave me all sorts of heebie-jeebies. 

-Frère Rubik

A:

Dear person,

Have big dreams even though making them come true can be scary. The best things in life come after being brave.

-Sheebs

A:

Dear Doctor,

I also auditioned for a graduation speech, and I'm still a bit bitter about not getting it (our valedictorian didn't even get to speak). My original speech consisted of at least ten quotes from Harry Potter, and the theme of my speech was Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up," but I did it subtly so people wouldn't know until it was too late.

That's right, I was going to rickroll my graduating class, and I would've gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling kids!

-Tally M.

A:

Dear you,

My high school had a weird way of determining the valedictorian, which meant that the valedictorian didn't get to speak at graduation. Instead of choosing the person with the highest GPA, they declared that everyone with a weighted GPA above a 4.0 was a valedictorian. It was silly, and I was bitter because I actually was the #1 in my class. But then again, I graduated early and didn't want to speak anyway. Everyone who spoke had to audition.

If I were speaking, my thoughts would be much more cynical than graduation speeches tend to be. Because let's be real, a high school diploma is hardly a major accomplishment. It's a basic requirement to be a successful adult. Is it normal to celebrate the end of your first educational era? Of course. But you shouldn't act like you've made a major stride into adulthood just by graduating from high school. 

I would advise them to actually learn things, because I didn't learn much in high school, but more importantly to learn about themselves. I think it's incredibly important to expand your horizons and learn what you really want out of life. Everyone should learn to work hard and learn to sacrifice. They should also live on their own so they can know what it means to be an independent adult. 

If you want people to listen, avoid cliches. Speak from the heart. Be amusing. My style is to be sarcastic and berate rather than inspire, so I can't be sure that will actually be helpful.

Love,

Luciana


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Question #86572 posted on 05/22/2016 9:36 p.m.
Q:

Dear Sheebs,

Recently I've started to work on losing weight (yay summer break!). But I've started to be demoralized by articles like these two:

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/08/opinion/sunday/why-you-cant-lose-weight-on-a-diet.html?hpw&rref=sunday-review&action=click&pgtype=Homepage&module=well-region&region=bottom-well&WT.nav=bottom-well

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/02/health/biggest-loser-weight-loss.html?action=click&contentCollection=Opinion&module=RelatedCoverage&region=EndOfArticle&pgtype=article

Which seem to argue that if you eat less and exercise, it's ultimately futile because over the coming years after the initial weight loss, your body will fight harder and harder to force you to regain the weight you lost by reducing your metabolism.

I'm kind of discouraged now. Thoughts?

-My Name Here

A:

Dear person,

They do argue that, but please don't be too discouraged. I have a lot of thoughts about this.

First article

Aamodt starts out by talking about set point theory, the idea that the brain tries to keep the body within a certain weight range. I think there is probably some merit to this theory in that fat cells have endocrine functions that cause appetite to increase when reserves get too low.

However, her explanation neglects to mention the influence of diet composition or exercise on physiological processes that impact weight. One that immediately comes to mind is that mind is the positive effect of exercise on insulin sensitivity but there are so many more factors at work. For instance, here is a random example I found about diet composition and here is one random example I found about exercise). The body is a much, MUCH more complicated system than what she portrays.

After that introduction she goes on to talk about Intuitive Eating (which isn't a new idea, by the way) and how trying to control eating too much ultimately backfires for most people. There is empirical support for a relationship between weight gain and excessive control/not listening to bodily signals, but this is also complicated because I think it is very unclear what "excessive control" even means. It's hard in a study to control all of the relevant factors (or even be aware of them in the first place) and I think it collectively creates a very muddy picture.

Furthermore, there is a lot of ideological stuff going on in Intuitive Eating that makes it difficult for me to trust as a comprehensive theory of how people should eat (I could elaborate on this at length but I will not torture the readership unless you want me to, in which case ask me something like "Sheebs, what do you think about the philosophical underpinnings of IE?" and then I will write you the novel). I mention this because I think that ideological reasons are part of why people advocate so strongly for extremes and use terrible logic/omit important details to promote their views. 

Anyways, the long and the short of this is that her article's explanation of the body's physiology is flawed and, at least in my opinion, the collective body of research about weight loss is flawed because there are so many biological, psychological, and sociological factors at work that are important that can't really be controlled and are often ignored. She also likely really wants to believe in Intuitive Eating (or whatever her version of it is) and she is only talking about things that support her views. 

Second article 

Keep in mind here that this article is talking about people who were very overweight who have lost large amounts of weight in a short amount of time. It's not representative of the general population. Also, we don't know what would have happened if the participants switched from a super unhealthy diet and no exercise to a sustainable moderately healthy diet with moderate exercise. Basically, people are still trying to make the Ancel Keys study work. But it just doesn't. 

Personal experience and opinions 

I was quite overweight as a teenager. I never really did any exercise and my diet was very, very unhealthy. It was all I had ever known because that was how my mother lived. When I got to college and all of my decisions were up to me, I lost a considerable amount of weight (in the neighborhood of 40-50 pounds) in the first year by eating somewhat healthier and exercising moderately.

After a year in college, I developed an eating disorder. It was a mess. I lost another 40 pounds and started experiencing all of the problems that the people in the Keys study experienced. I don't weigh myself anymore but I think I probably regained all of the weight I lost in the time I had the eating disorder, but not the weight I lost relatively easily when I left my mother's house.

So even though it's probably true that many people who are overweight will not be as thin as people who have never been overweight even if they change their habits, that does not mean that weight loss is futile. Also, even if weight doesn't change at all, there are still many health benefits to good eating and exercise habits.

Encouragement

I don't know how deep your discouragement goes but I want to share a little bit about what I learned in recovery with you.  

It's been almost four years since I began to recover now. For a long time and occasionally even now I will feel sad that I can't be thin and healthy at the same time. But I have no regrets about it because I have learned that my weight has nothing to do with who I am. Being thinner didn't make me any happier. Also, the important people in my life loved me the same before and after. And, while this isn't the be-all and end-all, I actually got asked out on way more dates after I recovered than when I had an eating disorder.

Weight does not impact your worth or how lovable you are or your potential to leave a beautiful impact on this world and the people around you. In this answer I did my best to explain why those articles are overly fatalistic about weight because I genuinely feel that they are misleading. But the real reason you should not be discouraged is this: you are a being infinite potential who is 100% worthy of love and belonging, and that is in no way dependent on how much you weigh. Anyone who says or makes you believe otherwise is completely and utterly wrong.

I am not sure where you are at on your journey or if this kind of encouragement was necessary (or even welcome) but I care a lot and these questions still really get to me. If you ever need a friend to listen, please feel free to email me at sheebs@theboard.byu.edu.

-Sheebs

A:

Dear My Name Here,

Don't get demoralized by those articles. I like what Sheebs points out. I would also say that if what you are saying is the case, then it would be hard for anyone to lose weight and keep it off. I'm sure you know of people who have successfully kept their weight off. My mom is actually a testament to the fact that it can be done. Just keep taking care of your body!

-Sunday Night Banter


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Posted on 05/22/2016 8:13 p.m. New Correction on: #86742 I'm looking for a very specific type of blog that I am not sure exists. This ...