Whenever he thought about it, he felt terrible. And so, at last, he came to a fateful decision. He decided not to think about it. ~John-Roger and Peter McWilliams
Monday, August 3, 2015
Question #83342 posted on 08/03/2015 10:58 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've had some nail polish for about 17 years now. How long does nail polish usually last? Do they have expiration dates? Is it harmful to use old polish on your nails or only that the product isn't up to par on quality?

-The littlest gamut.

A:

Dear Littlest,

Holy flip, 17 years? I first just want to say that I'm impressed.

Now, nail polish technically has to have an expiration date—well, any nail polish made after 2005, that is (so yours may not).

But does it really expire? Well, not exactly. There will never come a time when it will be harmful to your body to use an old nail polish. However, nail polish does expire in the sense that it can get all dried out, goopy, and disgusting. All of the gals out there know what I'm talking about. Still, if you manage to keep your nail polish out of the heat and close the lid every time, it can last for quite a while.

-Vienna, who has no idea why she held this question overdue for so long and is sorry


0 Corrections
Question #83382 posted on 08/03/2015 10:26 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Do any of you watch Gravity Falls, Steven Universe, or Over the Garden Wall? What are your thoughts on these shows?

-getting to know you

A:

Dear you,

I've seen Over the Garden Wall. I thought it was realllllllly weird at first but I grew to like it. I say "Ain't that just the way," at least once a day and my roommates and I listen to "Langtree's Lament" all the time. I hope they make a second season, but the first season finale pretty much tied everything up to a nice close so I don't anticipate it happening. 

I haven't heard of Gravity Falls but I do want to see Steven Universe. I've heard really good things about it so I'm looking forward to making time to watch it...eventually.

-Ms.O'Malley


0 Corrections
Posted on 08/03/2015 10:13 p.m. New Correction on: #83356 What can be done to address what I call "BYU syndrome"? Have you seen this happen? ...
Posted on 08/03/2015 9:23 p.m. New Correction on: #83372 Suppose there is one national-scale publisher of a given book, just to make things simple. All ...
Question #83379 posted on 08/03/2015 8:14 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board, 83314

I hate to be one of THOSE guys... but concerning B.Q. #83314, I think I was misunderstood- There was no doubt I have that dinosaurs existed, or that it is at odds with there being a God.
Perhaps my tone was deceiving. I don't know what was happening that day, but I didn't mean to be cynical...well, yes I did, but I didn't mean to imply a conspiracy that all dinosaur fossils are made of papier-mâché! I just found it quite odd that the simple information provided by Dr. Britt is not easily found, and most reports on the beginnings of paleontology begin with the 19th century and fail to recognize any previous discoveries. It was more of a curiosity that was communicated improperly.

-Velocirapto-Rancho Kookaburramunga

P.S. How can you not know who Carl Poppa is?!

A:

Dear Huevos Rancheromunga,

Is there a question here? It seems like you want something very specific from us, but since I apparently inferred incorrectly what you wanted last time in Board Question #83314 I'm disinclined to try and guess again.

As a cynic, you have hopefully observed science of basically any kind was not exactly stellar before the 19th century. They used to bleed people, remember?

As for Dr. Britt's information, he has a Ph.D. I am rather persuaded he knows his stuff, but also that he is busy enough that providing peer-reviewed literature to (so we thought) dinosaur conspiracy theorists isn't really a priority. Also, did you even bother to glance at the Reddit thread? Go do that.

Suerte,

--Ardilla Feroz

P.S. Sweet 'nym.


0 Corrections
Question #83363 posted on 08/03/2015 8:11 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've had non-LDS roommates in other states. One of them was subscribed to a Playboy subscription and other sexual oriented things. The magazine comes packaged in an envelope so you can't see any inappropriate material. Just wondering...how come this, and other sexual-mail content always says
"Sexually Oriented Ad"? You know it's going to be sexually oriented if it's from Playboy, and you know it's Playboy from the return address. Same with my roomy's other sexual mail stuff. It always had a warning that the material was sexual but you could clearly tell it's sexual by looking at the wording/phrases/pictures on the piece. So...what's the point in having a warning when you already know what it is?

-nordo

A:

Dear you,

They put the Surgeon General's warning on cigarettes, even though "everyone" already knows that cigarettes cause cancer. We tend to assume that everyone is in the same loop we are (for example, that everyone would know what a Playboy magazine is) but that's not always the case. Sometimes it's not so obvious, either. Thus, we have laws to regulate harmful or obscene products. But if you have a law saying that people have to mark their products as "Sexually Oriented Ads," you can't make an exception for Playboy simply because, hey, "you know it's going to be sexually oriented if it's from Playboy."

Check out this PDF if you're curious about more.

Yours, &c.

Heidi Book


0 Corrections
Question #83377 posted on 08/03/2015 7:01 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is your opinion of the use of car horns? I served my mission in a country where car horns were used to communicate by warning others of danger/their illegal actions and everyone just accepted it and actually avoided accidents because everyone was aware that something dangerous was happening near them. They even honked to say thank you for letting them in. I hear lots of opinions on it and I want to hear yours.

-Spectre

A:

Dear you,

When I first read your question, my thought was "how is that different than how car horns are used here?" Then I realized that most of my driving experience takes place in Canada, not Utah.

Anyways, I agree with that usage of car horns. I avoid using a polite toot as a "thank you," though, since people won't know why I'm doing it and will probably think I'm a jerk. Here in Utah, I mostly use it to signal people over ALL THE DANGER they are causing.

-Zedability

A:

Dear Spectre,

In China, car horns are used ALL THE TIME. You want to scoot in on traffic? You honk. Someone cut you off? You honk. You're beside someone? You honk. There is a bus up ahead? You honk. It's so loud and chaotic I don't know how they focus on driving! 

I feel like car horns should be used to alert other drivers of dangerous situations, like almost hitting another car or traffic quickly stopping ahead. Other than that, just drive!

-Ms.O'Malley


0 Corrections
Posted on 08/03/2015 5:51 p.m. New Correction on: #83341 I was listening to the audiobook, Us: A Novel, by David Nicholls, and was thoroughly enjoying ...
Question #83376 posted on 08/03/2015 4:38 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Questions on the 100 hour board are anonymous to people who are viewing them, but can the writers or editors see who is sending in the questions?

-Anonymous

A:

Dear An Ony Mouse,

That's a common query. So common, it has its own entry on the FAQ page.

Long story short: nobody sees your information right when you send in the question, but the editors can look it up if need be (but that's pretty rare, from what I gather).

-Frère Rubik


0 Corrections
Question #83373 posted on 08/03/2015 3:14 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have a guy friend that I want to set up with my sister. Both this guy and my sister are a little socially awkward, which is one reason why I think they'd be good for each other. I've been set up on several dates and no matter who the guy is they're always at least a little uncomfortable. So what can I do as the setter-upper to give my friend and my sister the best chance of having a fun and not painfully awkward date?

-The Happy Medium

A:

Dear Happy Medium,

I think the best thing you can do is approach it in a really low-key, non-intimidating way.

If I get set up on a date and it's a "hey, I have this great friend and we thought it would be fun if I set him up with someone so can I give him your number because I think you guys could have a fun time" kind of date, it's not awkward at all.

If I get set up on an "OH MY GOSH I have found your SOUL MATE and I have told him everything about you and I helped him stalk you on Facebook and what colors do you want for the wedding because by the way he is almost 30 and he's pretty marriage hungry" kind of date—yeah, it's awkward.

Another writer might have better advice than that, but for me, that really is the best advice. Don't make a big deal about it and hopefully they won't feel any added pressure.

Also, it couldn't hurt to suggest a few low-key, fun activities that you know your sister will enjoy to the guy in mind. That way he doesn't have to stress too much about planning it.

Good luck!

-Vienna

A:

Dear you,

In keeping with Vienna's low-key, low-stress advice: would it be possible or reasonable for you to get a date and double with them? Then both of them have at least one person there they're already comfortable with.

~Anne, Certainly


0 Corrections
Question #83356 posted on 08/03/2015 12:55 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What can be done to address what I call "BYU syndrome"? Have you seen this happen? Where bright kids come to BYU and as, their mothers describe it, "get swallowed up", then end up discouraged, lonely, or clinically depressed. They can end up with any number of dire consequences, including loosing scholarships, academic probation, or worst of all, feeling like the Lord has forgotten them. A friend and former BYU Bishop referred to these as "the Ninety and nine". Those who have always chosen the right, never needed much help, and then come to BYU and get lost. How can BYU make sure that none of these bright, talented young people feel so alone and discouraged that they leave BYU and/or the church?

A:

Dear you,

According to this article, young adults who don't go to college are twice as likely to commit suicide as those who do. While suicide rates are definitely not a comprehensive measure of the wide variety of mental health challenges people face, I think it's also important to remember that the pressures of college alone aren't always responsible for mental health issues. Many mental health issues tend to arise in the late teens or early twenties, and can be triggered by a variety of life circumstances. For instance, this New York Times article talks about how many colleges and universities have their own version of what you call "BYU syndrome." I think it can be important for people to realize that at least academically, they'd be very likely to feel the same at any university. This can help them decouple their feelings of stress, anxiety, or depression from the Church. While certain things about Church culture can certainly be difficult for people who are struggling, it's important to recognize that it's not the Church that's bad; it's the stress of university life combining with some very concentrated aspects of Church culture.

The NYT article does a much better job than I ever could of addressing secular preventative measures, so I'll add on some about the Church. The other day, one of my Facebook friends posted a very optimistic and inspiring quote from a Church leader, but then added her own words: "If you're not happy, you're not living the gospel right." I know she meant well, but it was a struggle to not let that make my mood even worse. I'm pretty sure I'm living the gospel reasonably "right," but I've been struggling a lot with depression myself recently, and the last thing I need to hear is that if I'm not happy, it's a reflection on my righteousness or commitment to the Church. I think the Church sometimes creates this idea that happiness is a moral duty, when in reality, some blessings are delayed and most people will experience plenty of trials in life. It's important to face those trials with faith and a good attitude, but it's toxic to tell people that they need to be happy or it's their fault somehow. We need to learn to mourn with those that mourn, instead of being like Job's friends and making people feel like it's a reflection on their righteousness when things go wrong. This can be an especially difficult feeling for people who do struggle with some aspect of the Church - realistically, their difficulty with one commandment or point of doctrine isn't causing every trial in their life, especially anxiety and depression, which are common to all college students. But we sure do a good job of making people feel this way, which causes them to feel like the Church isn't right for them and/or lose hope.

On the other hand, I was in a great Relief Society lesson a few weeks ago where this girl raised her hand and made a comment in which she shared about being diagnosed with depression and anxiety in high school. My friend went up and thanked her for her comment after class, and that's how I learned that my friend has depression too. Now we can all talk to each other and support each other. This girl has just been called as one of the new Relief Society teachers and I'm really looking forward to her lessons, because she's very real about the weaknesses and struggles that we all have. Basically, I think it's important that we take down our masks at Church and talk honestly about difficult things. That will help people realize that they're not alone, and it doesn't make them bad members when they're struggling.

I was about to finish this up, but then I came across an article from my mission president's son, who is a psychiatrist. It explains some of the things I'm thinking, so I'll leave you with that.

-Zedability


1 Correction
Question #83372 posted on 08/03/2015 12:26 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Suppose there is one national-scale publisher of a given book, just to make things simple. All copies of this book came from the same source, same publishing batch.

Suppose it is a very popular book, and is in libraries across the nation.

My question: is it likely to have one and the same call number across all the libraries, kind of like ISBNs, or do library systems independently create call numbers for books in their collections?

-Dewey

A:

Dear Patron,

Library call numbers are consistent across library systems. Harry Potter will have the same Dewey Decimal call number at a library in Utah as it will in New York. This is true also for the Library of Congress call number system. 

-A Librarian


1 Correction
Question #83371 posted on 08/03/2015 9:32 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

As most of you know, I recently went through a broken engagement with that good 'ol boyfriend I used to talk about all the time on here. It's been about two months and I'm starting to feel okay again. I miss being in a relationship but I have very little desire to ever date again (at the moment anyway). In the meantime, to avoid crippling sadness and drinking two gallons of apple juice in under an hour (not an effective way to drown your sorrows, btw), I've been enjoying being single and living it up. Kind of. It's hard for me to see all of the benefits of being alone when I don't want to be alone.

So married writers: what's the one thing you miss most about being single? No matter how small it might be. Single writers: what do you think are the biggest perks of your current situation in life? What do you do when you're alone and bored? How many hours each week do you find that you spend alone and bored?

-Concorde

A:

Dear Concorde,

Hey, I am so sorry! I had no idea! I only met you once, but I always thought you were one of the best writers the Board ever had. I hope everything works out for the best.

As far as the perks of being single go, well, considering I've more or less been single my entire life, I have noticed a few advantages along the way.

- You are free to spend your money however you want. If you want to buy an overpriced towel just because it's so soft you can hardly believe it, you can! If you want to go to Krispy Kreme for the second time this week, nobody is going to stop you!

- You are free to use your time however you want. Whatever you feel like doing, you can do it without being concerned about someone else. You feel like chillin' in your pajama pants and watching TV all day? Do it! Well, actually you shouldn't do that, probably, but the point is you can if you want to!

- You are free to have random adventures that you might not be able to have if you were married. When you're single you can have spur-of-the-moment road trips any time you want! You can even leave the country to have an adventure without worrying about someone you left behind. Study abroad? Sure! Summer in Europe because you feel like it? Go for it! Nothing is tying you down.

- You have tons of time to discover new hobbies and talents! When you're single you are free to take a little time to be a little selfish and figure out what makes you happy. 

- Friends. I know married people have friends, too, but from what I hear you don't have quite as much time to socialize with other people. When you are single you have SO many opportunities to get to know and befriend other people and to be with those people whenever you want to be with them. And that's pretty great.

- Finally, you never know what (or should I say who) life will bring next. I'm sure it must be difficult to even think about dating right now, but this is one of my favorite things about being single. The experience of falling in love with someone new is still in your future and you never know when or how it will happen. I think that's pretty exciting.

Much love and best wishes,

Vienna

A:

Dear Concorde,

I'm sorry to hear about that. I think it's great that you're looking for the positive, but also remember that it's perfectly normal to feel like you don't want to be alone. Don't feel bad about feeling bad, as it were.

You probably already have that down, but I figured I'd just put that in.

I think the benefits of being independent are just that; I'm not dependent on anyone, and no one is dependent on me. I'm free to use my time however I want to, whether I'm watching Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell or working on the Board or playing PS2. I'm not constantly worried about what someone else is thinking or feeling, and I don't feel an obligation to spend time with anyone if I don't want to (actually, for the past couple of weeks all of my roommates have been out of town, and I'm surprisingly content just living by myself).

When you're single, you're completely free to just be you and do what you want to. That's something to savor for a bit, I think.

-Frère Rubik

A:

Dear Ten,

Well, you know most of my life since we chat a lot, but for the sake of everyone else, I'll list some of my perks.

I'm going to have complete control over design in my new apartment when I graduate. I can make whatever I want for meals. I don't have to let anyone know where I'm going or what I'm doing. I can choose to budget my time to hang out with whoever I want. I can hang out with all sorts of guys and not have someone wondering about my friendships. I can randomly treat myself to a vacation because I feel like it.

When I'm alone and bored, I try to pursue some of my interests—usually while watching TV so I don't feel so alone. This might include transcribing my journals or working on family history. Right now while I'm in school, I don't spend a lot of time alone, but I'm anticipating a lot more free time once that's over with. However, I've got a lot of hobbies that I want to pick up/start, so I don't think I'll be bored for long.

-Tally M.

A:

Dearly missed Concorde,

I didn't know either, I'm sorry!

Like Frere and Tally say, you have more control over decisions like what to eat, when to eat, how to decorate, what to buy, what to do. Owlet and I compromise quite a bit on what we buy and how much importance we attach to different things, and how much money we spend on said things. She insists on buying a lot of frivolous things like vegetables and fruits, while I can survive off just ice cream and ramen.

-El-ahrairah

A:

Dear Concorde,

I'd say control over bedtime is probably the biggest perk of being single, although I'm terrible at self-regulating my bedtime so it's probably good that I have someone else to keep me accountable now. Like some of the other writers said, you don't have to compromise on food or spending preferences. Another really big one is that when you have a bad day, you can come home and be grumpy without having to remember to exercise enough self control to not be terribly rude to someone you love who isn't at fault for your bad day anyways. (It's harder than it sounds sometimes.)

-Zedability

A:

Dear Concorde,

The amount of opportunities to stay in sweats and have gross hair infinitely increases when you don't have to worry about snuggling with a boy. I say this only partly in jest, while lounging in sweats with unwashed (and probably smelly) hair. 

I never got to meet you, but your answers were hilarious, insightful, and always well written. Thanks for the example you set. I hope things turn up for you soon. 

-Auto Surf


0 Corrections
Question #83355 posted on 08/03/2015 9:31 a.m.
Q:

Dear Boid of da One Hundred Owas,

Are there/were there health reasons to consider a woman "unclean" during the days of her period in Mosaic Law, much like there were for circumcision?

"Hey, is this bacon Kosher?"
-Rabbi Krustofski

A:

Dear Amy,

The biggest reason that they could be considered unclean is simply because of the sanitation cost of having a period. Even with pads and tampons it can be a hassle, let alone without the modern conveniences. However, I can't find any great sources that help explain this, so you can take my word for it, or you can hope a reader submits a comment with something they've found.

-Tally M.


0 Corrections
Question #83367 posted on 08/03/2015 7:56 a.m.
Q:

My Dear Vienna,

I've spent five lonely midnights on the empire state building with tacos. Where are you?

-Chris Pratt

A:

Dear Chris Pratt,

Oh my gosh, I had no idea you read the Board! Though I suppose I should have surmised it. After all, who doesn't read the Board?

As flattering as this is, I am going to have to decline your offer. I mean, I couldn't do that to your wife, Anna! As attractive as you and I both are, it simply isn't worth splitting a family apart over.

I will, however, accept the tacos if you can find a way to get them to me.

Love,

Vienna

P.S. Any other (unmarried) attractive male celebrities who follow the Board (I'm assuming there are many) are welcome to email me. Or bring me tacos.

P.P.S. Actually the tacos thing goes out to anybody, celebrity or not.


0 Corrections
Question #83365 posted on 08/03/2015 7:56 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I love the Board, and I love reading your answers to questions, but it seems like lately, you don't actually answer, or only partially answer people's questions. Why is that?

Examples:
#83284: Where the person asked about good Thai food and you said Thai food wasn't worth it. Clearly it is to that person.

#83284: About why people buy expensive caskets, which wasn't really answered at all, just dodged.

#83309: This was only partially answered, and no one really answered the what is it about high heels that is attractive to guys question.

I know it takes a certain amount of effort to answer questions, but why sign up for a question that you are not going to give a real answer to? It seems like you are not taking the person's question seriously.

-Irritated

A:

Dear you,

For the Thai food question, when a reader essentially asks "Where can I get good Thai food in Provo?" and the answer is "There is no good Thai food in Provo," that's a legitimate answer. As another lover of Asian food, I can confirm that Utah is sadly lacking in that department, and that answer was probably the most accurate answer it was possible to give.

Similarly, for a question like "My roommate says guys find high heels attractive. Why?", none of the male Board writers seemed to agree that high heels were that attractive or important to them. Since the attractiveness of high heels is an opinion based question, if all the Board writers share the opposite opinion from the questioner, it's often impossible to provide an answer other than "No this is wrong."

As for the casket question, we had a writer hold it over hours, realize they couldn't complete it, and delete their response, which is why it appears incomplete. However, the actual answer is implied; caskets seem to cost an approximately similar amount of money no matter how many features contribute to preserving the corpse.

-Zedability

A:

Dear Irritated,

Apply to be a Board writer!

The more committed, dedicated writers we have, the better the quality of the Board, am I right?

In fact, we will be instigating a new policy starting now. Every time a reader points out something that the Board could improve upon, we will e-mail them their very own Board writer application.*

Just remember... writing for the Board is not as easy as it seems!

Much love,

Vienna

*Not technically true, but I wish it was.


0 Corrections
Question #83370 posted on 08/03/2015 1:32 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

How do you exercise in the morning if you're not suppose to exercise on an empty stomach or right after eating? If I wake up, eat a banana, and go back to sleep I'm messing with my sleep cycle. If I wake up, eat a banana, and wait to exercise I have to sit around sleepy for 45 minutes. What's the best way to healthily exercise in the morning?

Thanks,

lightweight

A:

Dear Hot Papa's Salsa,

The idea is balance. If you don't eat anything, you don't have anything to help your blood sugar stay up, and you may feel faint. On the other hand, if you chug your roommate's gallon of milk then your body will begin to divert energy and bloodflow to your stomach to digest the massive meal you have just ingested. Well, if you drank that much milk you would have... different problems, but you get the idea. 

So eat your banana, and go exercise knowing you ain't gonna die suddenly if you do so. If you'd like more specific instructions about when to eat in relation to when you exercise, I suggest you mosey on down to the Richards Building at BYU and ask an Exercise Science major, for there are many.

Suerte,

--Ardilla Feroz


0 Corrections
Question #83369 posted on 08/03/2015 12:14 a.m.
Q:

Has anyone ever asked just this before? I couldn't find it in the archives.
What was the answer?


"Dear 100 Hour Board,

My Question Here.

-My Name Here"

A:

Dear Anon y Mouse

We are pleased to see that your archive-searching skills are growing. But, you have much yet to learn. 

The question you asked has, indeed, been asked before, at least twice. Once was during this year's reunion week. The other was in March 2011. The latter question was answered with a response so fitting that said question has now risen to the #6 spot on the list of the Most Popular Responses of All Time (though, with a few more votes, it could jump up to #5). 

To aid you in your further archive searches, know this: if you know the question or answer you're looking for contains a specific phrase (such as, for example, "My Question Here."), put said phrase in quotation marks when you search it, like so. Then, instead of treating each word as an individual keyword, the Board search engine will look for the phrase as a whole.

We wish you luck in your future Board travels.

-Frère Rubik (who doesn't know why he started using the royal "we" but is sticking to it)


0 Corrections
Question #83368 posted on 08/03/2015 12:08 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I just finished watching the Theory of Everything and I'm sort of curious why we care so much about Stephen Hawking's opinion on theological matters. I mean, I do too and I don't even know why. How come we don't care what Degrasse Tyson, Higgs, Heisenberg, Eyring, or Bohr think nearly as much?


-Mormon Scientist

A:

Dear Keynote Address of Doom,

Well, it may be that Stephen Hawking is pretty cool, as evidenced by his appearance on The Simpsons. But honestly I have never heard Hawking's opinion on theological matters. What does he opine? I am reasonably sure Degrasse Tyson is an atheist, pretty sure Eyring is not an atheist, and I haven't bothered to find out the theological opinions of the rest. If not finding out is not caring, chalk it up to a combination of laziness and their opinions on theology just not being that important to me. I would rather learn about Higgs's contribution to particle physics, Heisenberg's uncertainty principle and Bohr's theory of atomic orbitals as a step to figuring out how they actually work.

Suerte,

--Ardilla Feroz


0 Corrections
Sunday, August 2, 2015
Q:

Dear Board,

There are stories behind every scatter plot, and the puzzle I'm trying to solve is about WWII service participation and employment trends. Utah (and Nevada) stick out a lot from the general pattern.

Is there anything distinctive about Mormons and service in WWII?

What about work decisions of Mormon women whose husbands fought in the war?

Thanks!
-C4, too lazy to research this for her nonmember friend herself, figuring the Board probably has better resources

A:

Dear you,

This is a hard question to find the answer to when we don't know exactly what the trends are. If you'd like to resubmit the question with some of the data, or a description of what the trends look like, we'll try to answer your question. If the data is difficult to share or explain in a Board question, you can email it to me and I'll post it in the writer forum for people to look at.

-Zedability


0 Corrections
Question #83351 posted on 08/02/2015 5:25 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are your thoughts on the recent events involving Planned Parenthood and the calls for defunding it?

Thanks,

pistachio pudding

A:

Dear you,

My thoughts:

1) I don't know and haven't researched adequately to know how credible these videos are, particularly since I've seen doubt about them.

2) I don't like Planned Parenthood anyways.

3) Cool story if the government defunds them. If the government wants to subsidize women's healthcare, it can do so directly (for examples of direct subsidies, consider programs like SNAP), rather than by providing funding to questionable organizations.

~Anne, Certainly


0 Corrections
Question #83353 posted on 08/02/2015 5:25 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

If the Church and the Boy Scouts part ways, what program should the Young Men implement in its place, if any?

-Be Prepared

A:

Dear bp,

I think they could just add a few categories to the Duty to God program, like "Physical" (with the option of camping and the like), and that'd be enough.

-El-ahrairah

A:

Dear Prepared, 

All I'm saying is that if and when the Church overhauls the BSA program, they will include more outdoor opportunities for the Young Women. Maybe it was just my stake, but the YW got 3 days of Girls Camp once a year while the YM had a weekend campout almost every month in addition to longer trips during the summer. 

-Ms.O'Malley


0 Corrections
Question #83338 posted on 08/02/2015 5:24 p.m.
Q:

Dear Board,

When I got married I got diagnosed with a sexual disorder called vaginismus. Basically when anything comes towards my vagina it closes up, like your eye does when something is coming towards it, to protect itself. Good news is it doesn't require surgery to fix, I just have to work through physical therapy to retrain the muscles. Since my insurance isn't great and since my first (and only) pelvic exam hurt so much and felt so violating that I still cry when I think about going to a doctor for this (like I cry wherever I am, in class, at work, it's a pretty strong reaction that I can't control) I opted for the self help system from vaginismus.com to save on costs.

I've been trying to work through this for years, and though my husband has been incredibly supportive, I have the hardest time being motivated. I don't like to do the exercises when I'm on my period, because it's disgusting and not recommended. I tried making myself a reward system, where after every few days of success I can have a reward, but there's nothing that I can think of that I want enough to actually motivate me. I have enough money to just buy things if I need them, and something small like candy doesn't seem very motivating and something big like clothes I don't really want. Often, my exercises just remind of me of what I can't do and make me feel very inadequate and depressed.

For anyone who has dealt with similar issues with feeling discouraged with physical therapy, what did you do? How can I get motivated and not just feel like my body is useless?

-My Name Here

A:

Dear friend, 

I really love watching TED Talks on motivation, but I actually have learned the most from the book Change Anything. It explains why motivating ourselves can be so hard and goes through simple steps of how to fix them. You'll have to read the book for the full effect, but here's a snippet from a summary I wrote for class last winter. 

“When people believe that their ability to make good choices stems from nothing more than their willpower – and that willpower is a quality they’re either born with or they’re not – they eventually stop trying altogether."

This is the trap that so many of us fall into-- making goals and getting stuck in a downward cycle of not keeping them and then becoming discouraged when we continue to fail. The book reframes the idea of willpower, saying it is not an unchangeable trait, but a skill that can be refined. We are outnumbered and blinded by all the outward forces trying to bring us down. These range from carpet patterns in casinos to peppy music in buffets. But when we pay attention to the problem and outward influences, we are able to apply the solution better. As we come to better understand what works for us and against us, we will be able to overcome challenges and become active agents in our lives.

It then goes on to outline the following six principles of action: 1) Love What you Hate; 2) Do What you Can’t; 3-4) Turn Accomplices into Friends; 5) Invert the Economy; and 6) Control Your Space.

“Love What You Hate” works with changing personal motivation. Instead of promising to make good but hard choices tomorrow — denying every urge to sleep in, eat sweets, or indulge — it is better to shift the paradigm so that a future self becomes the present reality. Learning about the realities of making good choices, using value words to understand and establish your motivations, enjoying the journey, and creating a personal motivation statement all play a part in loving the tasks ahead. 

“Do What You Can’t” puts motivation into action and increases ability to follow through on seemingly unachievable or undesirable tasks. Different strategies are formed to overcome internal weaknesses, mainly utilizing present abilities (such as responding well to peer pressure, searching for bargains, etc.), perfecting practices, and developing.

“Turn Accomplices into Friends” creates a positive and encouraging network around you. Many addictive habits are done in a social setting. This principle flips social situations from being a trap to a strength by enabling the people you spend time with to help you on the road to health, happiness, and success. At the same time, readers are challenged to stop making external comparisons, make their goals clear to their social networks, and add friends to help them along the way. 

“Invert the Economy” deals with incentives in moderation. Excessive or grandiose rewards can hinder real progress in changing. In addition, traditional incentives are reversed to focus on loss aversion rather than reward gaining, relying on the concept that we are much more likely to protect something of value at risk than to solely be motivated by future prizes and rewards.

Finally, “Control Your Space” demands that readers take charge of their surrounding environment. Choosing to avoid tempting situations, “[keeping] good things close…and bad things distant,” using tools, and creating reminders about your goals all assist in achieving goals. This step should not be used instead of the 6-source plan, but can used in conjunction with the other principles for a successful endeavor.

(I know they have this book in the BYU library, and I assume you can find in your local library if you're not at BYU.) 

As for feeling discouraged, I would start with this. It's an inspiring story and a reminder that we can have a broken body but a whole soul. The wholeness from within allows us to be more than conquerers over our physical limitations.

But even with reminders, you may still feel like you are broken at times. I've seen it happened to others and I know I've felt this from my own health challenges. For me, the dynamic, destructive duo of depression and anxiety make life quite unbearable sometimes. Because of how much they affect my ability to process, reason, trust, hope, function properly, and move forward, it often feels like my soul is broken and not just my body. As if I, as a whole, am useless, not just parts of me. It can be difficult, as it is now, to understand how God could allow an imperfection that seems to obstruct every desire to do what He has asked. Sometimes the hate I have for my struggle disables me more than the depression itself.

Feelings like this are real. I think it's okay to acknowledge and understand them. As a wise Board writer once said, "It's okay to be sad about sad things." But as real as they are, and as hard as it is for me to admit right now, they aren't true. God has promised to make us strong when we encounter weakness. I used to think that meant my weakness would be taken away and replaced with strength; I thought that weakness and strength were opposite and could not coexist. I'm learning that God can make us strong in our weakness. The humility and sorrow allows us to connect with other people and truly appreciate all that our Savior has done for us. 

I don't know you personally, but I do know that you are not useless, physically or otherwise. I hope some of what I've written can help. Please don't hesitate to email me if you'd ever like to talk more. 

-Auto Surf

A:

Dear you,

In addition to Auto Surf's thoughts, I'd just like to point out that sex is far from the only way your body can be useful. While you may be experiencing challenges with this, it doesn't make your body useless. You can run, swim, laugh, provide other forms of affection, make music, cook, or participate in virtually any other kind of activity. Our bodies are a tremendous gift in a lot of ways, and sometimes we become tempted to see our bodies only in terms of their limitations. Try to focus on the positive things you can do with your body, especially ways that it facilitates strengthening your relationship with your husband in a variety of areas.

Because vaginismus is often exacerbated by psychological barriers, seeing a counselor is often helpful. I think you would benefit from this, both from your description of your emotional reaction to the pelvic exam and in order to help you stay motivated with therapy. I know you said your insurance isn't great, but I'd strongly recommend looking into possibilities in that area. Ask your husband to help you. If you're in Utah County, you could try making an appointment at the BYU Comprehensive Clinic.

-Zedability


0 Corrections
Question #83364 posted on 08/02/2015 5:20 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why did Bill Cosby admit to having drugged women for sex? I understand that he was under oath but so many famous people have lied. There are probably MANY, MANY more who never got caught. Cosby probably could've lied and said he did no such thing and it could've probably never been proven. Isn't it better, for him, for us to only have speculations about what he's done instead of us having the fact that he admitted to it? (Kind of like the whole Did-Michael-Jackson-really-abuse-kids-or-not? thing).

-Famous Fanny

A:

Dear Ulysses,

I don't know his motives, but I respect his honesty. I'm glad he had the courage to admit his mistakes, especially since he was under oath. I would rather deal with an honest confession and the sure knowledge it brings than with more lies and wrong-doing to cover things up.

-Auto Surf


0 Corrections
Posted on 08/02/2015 5:10 p.m. New Correction on: #83362 I recently read Yes Please by Amy Poehler, which I didn't find funny in the least. ...
Question #83362 posted on 08/02/2015 2:14 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I recently read Yes Please by Amy Poehler, which I didn't find funny in the least. Anyway, her mom mentions that she gave birth to Amy and Amy's brother via Twilight Sleep in the hospital. I guess this is no longer a "thing". Why not? By the way the mom described it, it seemed desirable, what with no childbirth pain, and when you wake up, you're already a mommy without having to go through all the discomfort of pushing. What, are there like, major side effects to this or something? Why is this no longer an option?

-Christmas Cactus

A:

Dear you,

According to Wikipedia, there were complications including negative physical side effects on the infants (drowsiness and poor breathing) as well as the negative emotional effects of mothers not being more involved in labor.

~Anne, Certainly


1 Correction
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board Dudes,

Would it bother you if you found out that a girl you are starting to date has never kissed anyone at 28? (He's had a ton of girlfriends before). And has no idea how it....works?

-The dumb one, unsure if she should just pretend she knows what's happening

A:

Dear you,

I'm not a dude, but as someone who never kissed a guy until her twenties, I want to express some solidarity with you. There are plenty of valid reasons to hold on to the VL card for longer than some other people might.

I would think that a guy might be surprised that someone he wants to kiss (and therefore obviously thinks is great) hasn't kissed anyone else already, but I think that after the initial surprise, a good guy can probably get over it and hopefully even feel special if you choose him to be your first kiss (although it's possible he'd also find that intimidating.)

As for how it works, I think this is one of those things we worry about way too much before it happens. People have been figuring out how to kiss for centuries. Odds are your first kiss won't be your most technically perfect kiss, but that doesn't mean it can't be special for both of you.

Love,

~Anne, Certainly

A:

Dear Tears from the Puzzle Box,

Anne has hit it out of the park as usual, but no, it wouldn't bother me. I think it's actually pretty cool.

Suerte,

--Ardilla Feroz

A:

Dear Doing Pretty Well,

As a third witness, I wouldn't mind at all. In fact, I think I'd prefer that to hearing werf say "oh yeah, I've made out with [redacted], [expurgée], [redactada], [redacted] multiple times, etc..." Given my track record, I don't think it'd be fair to hold anyone else to a different standard (not that I would, were things different).

-Frère Rubik


0 Corrections
Question #83358 posted on 08/02/2015 10:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I just downloaded Songpop 2. After spinning for a daily prize I won 2 tickets. What in the world are thses tickets and what do they do?

-el homie

A:

Dear Homie,

From this source:

"In SongPop 2, players have access to new songs as well as a new gameplay mode: Party Mode.

In Party Mode, players compete in tournament-style games against four others, with each party based on a particular theme, like Country or R&B songs, or music from the 1980s, as examples. Players spend tickets to access each timed party, with each round containing 10 song clips and multiple-choice questions based on song or artist identification."

Good luck!

-Vienna


0 Corrections
Question #83352 posted on 08/02/2015 9:14 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've dropped in to The Board Board a few times to see if any questions/answers I liked were being discussed. Mostly, I'm just disappointed because so many posts turn in to discussions that are heavily slanted against church teachings. It also seems like any time someone is brave enough to stand up for church teachings, there are a handful of people who swoop in to dissect or discredit their views.

It's just not really a friendly place. And it's sad because I love the board for its LDS perspective.

So, I'd like to know why affiliation (even unofficial) is allowed? Who started The Board Board? Has it always been like this? Also, are there any other 100 hour board discussion forum out there I could try? I suppose they'd just get infiltrated anyways...

-Blargh

A:

Dear Blergh,

This was a more involved question than I'd anticipated, since I thought that The Board Board was created by the writers and linked to somewhere on the main Board site. Then, to my consternation, I found that it wasn't referenced anywhere (at least, on the regular pages. A couple of questions mention it). This was really confusing; I knew about The Board Board before I became a writer, but for the life of me, I can't remember how I discovered it.

Anyway, that will probably forever remain a mystery, but the rest isn't.

In discussing this with other writers, someone said that they thought Laser Jock had started it. I reached out to Laser Jock for a comment, and this is what he told me:

The Board board was started by a reader in 2007, under the username of Moxie. The Board has never had an official relationship with it, but we have linked to it occasionally in answers (and there are some questions mentioning it as well).

He goes on to mention that, while he didn't start it, he did eventually take over the responsibility of hosting it, which he continues to do to this day (isn't he great?).

So, there's no official link between the Board and the Board Board. Were someone to create the Board Board Board (a discussion forum where people discuss the Board Board), that would also probably be unofficial. It's like a fan club, in a way. You don't need anybody's permission to get together with other people and talk about something you love.

Since we're not in charge of it, we don't do any sort of moderation, even if the conversation reflects poorly on us. I suppose one of us could try to become super active on the Board Board and eventually become an administrator and try to control things that way, but that seems unlikely. Plus, that's kind of missing the point: the Board Board and other forums like it try to encourage open discussion of whatever they focus on. The purpose of the thing is lost if one person is trying to control the conversation and what's said.

So, you find yourself wanting to discuss the Board, but you're not happy with the current discussion on Board Board. As I see it, you have three options:

1) Leave the Board Board and find somewhere else to discuss the Board.

Unfortunately, that's a little easier said than done (well, the finding a different discussion place part. Leaving's not too hard). The closest thing I could find to another online discussion forum was this BYU Subreddit, but even that's three years old. Anything else seemed to be either related to us or some blog from the mid-2000's. I'll mention another possibility later on, but for now, as far as online options go, there's not a lot.

(You know, if you really wanted to, you could talk to us about the 100 Hour Board. Like, you could create a big, group email where we're all talking about things. Do you know how great that would be? So great. Just a thought.)

2) Attempt to turn the tide of the discussion yourself.

It could seem like your opinion is very much in the minority. But, it could be that there are lots of other like-minded people reading the Board Board who don't post for the same reason you do. If you present counterpoint, it could give them something to rally to. I'm not saying the point is to "win" and completely dominate the conversation in the other direction; I just strongly believe that the best discussions come about when you have multiple points of view to work with (which is why, if you have an opinion about some thing (or a lot of things) that you feel doesn't get expressed a lot here, you might want to consider applying to be a writer).

3) Bring others to your cause. 

There are probably people in your life that you interact with frequently and like to engage in conversation. Do they read the Board? Consider taking up the call to be a "Board missionary" of sorts and introduce the Board to people who you think might find it interesting. If they do, then you've got more people to talk about it with offline, and if you really wanted to, you could get them on the Board Board to help you out (assuming they share your same viewpoints). The writers came up with a bunch of Board "business cards" when they made the St. Patrick's Day Scavenger Hunt, and I'm sure we could get you some. We're also constantly kicking around ideas for how we can find new readers, and we'll be sure to let y'all know any way you can help (conversely, if you have ideas about ways to share the Board, we'd love to hear them). 

So, those are my thoughts. Hopefully something in all of that helps you out.

To you and all of our other dedicated readers, thank you so much for your support. You are the reason we keep doing what we do. We love you and can't wait to hear whatever questions you think up next.

-Frère Rubik


0 Corrections