Dear Buggy,

Have professionals check for things first (exterminator for infestation signs, doctor to see if they are actually bedbug bites). If that's already been confirmed, then there's really nothing you can do about it other than just pay for the exterminator and treatment for your daughter. If you're wondering about getting over the social awkwardness that you now have with the neighbor, then you just kind of have to deal with it. How to deal with someone who isn't upfront and honest is a method that will vary person to person. If you want to forgive them totally and invite them over next week, that's great; or you cold tell them that you're offended about their choice; or you could never talk to them again. It's all up to you!

-Tootles

Dear Lostie,

I have to make a BIG assumption about your viewpoint from what you've said. I don't like doing that, but I don't personally know you, so that's all I've got. You seem to think that being LDS or having a testimony means that life will never be sad, and that if other people are happier than you but you're following the "better" rule set, then clearly being a member of the LDS Church does nothing for you. Following Jesus Christ does not give you a "trump card"; it is the ONLY way to gain true happiness and have the world make any sense. It isn't something that God gave us to put us above difficulty, it's something he gave us to make the struggle worth something. You mentioned that you frequently put more thought into day-to-day life than your relationship with God. Don't you think that might be why you're not seeing any benefits to being a member of the Church? You might go to meetings every Sunday, but in your heart, you don't seem to be participating much. 

To your statement about "Mormon rhetoric", I got a great truth pointed out to me in Book of Mormon: Satan is not the cause of all evil, just the spokesman for it. WE are where a lot of problems come from; the bad is in us, as a part of our mortal experience. Satan doesn't attack us, just gives us a lot of chances and ways to make bad choices. All the big struggles of your life are inside you. So, what you need to do is buckle down, try a little harder, and win!

I've been a bit harsh. But I have the same faith in you that I have in all of us here on this big green-and-blue planet. You can overcome the mundane and difficult and become a happier, better person. Go see your bishop and be frank with him about your feelings so he can try and help you out. If you do nothing, you get no results, but if you work for it, you'll be able to overcome your problems. Just work a little harder each day, and things will start to pan out. Good luck.

-Tootles

Dear tired,

You "know," huh? You've seen them accept money and then buy and use drugs or alcohol?  You've seen them decide that they'd rather live on the street than find a job (or in some cases live on the street despite having a job)?  King Benjamin had a word to say to people with your attitude:

And also, ye yourselves will succor those that stand in need of your succor; ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need; and ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to perish.
Perhaps thou shalt say: The man has brought upon himself his misery; therefore I will stay my hand, and will not give unto him of my food, nor impart unto him of my substance that he may not suffer, for his punishments are just—
But I say unto you, O man, whosoever doeth this the same hath great cause to repent; and except he repenteth of that which he hath done he perisheth forever, and hath no interest in the kingdom of God. -- Mosiah 4:16-18

Or maybe you should look at it from this perspective:

The survey cities reported that, on average, 26 percent of homeless adults were severely mentally ill, 16 percent were physically disabled, 15 percent were employed, 13 percent were victims of domestic violence, 13 percent were veterans, and four percent were HIV Positive. --U.S. Conference of Mayors 2011 Status Report on Hunger & Homelessness

It seems to be a common belief within a certain political party that poor and homeless people are just lazy good-for-nothings.  But it's simply not true.  They are mainly people who have been dealt a bad hand and then people like you come along and kick dirt on them instead of helping them.  Heaven forbid some of our tax dollars go towards helping people instead of shooting and bombing them.  You want the police to come and take them away so you don't have to see them, but you're not willing to provide a social welfare system that would prevent them from living on the streets in the first place.

-obstreperous

Dear Tired,

Oh for the love. It's not against the law to ask somebody for money even if you don't need it. This isn't mail fraud. And the cops have better things to do anyway.

No Dice

Dear Paprika,

I completely understand your frustration. I've worked on Temple Square for over 10 years and the panhandlers have, for the most part, been the same people the entire time. I don't like that people are taking advantage of others' charitable inclinations. I've seen them get in their cars at the end of the day and drive off and I've seen them depositing tons of change at a local bank. I often want to tell everyone who gives them money, "Hey, friends! These guys make a career out of this! Donate to the Humanitarian Center! Or the Church Welfare Fund!" But in reality, that clearly can't happen. 

So while I get that it's hard watching other people get manipulated and it's frustrating that you can't do anything, I have to reiterate that your only available course of action is to just choose not to give them money yourself. Or petition for panhandling to be illegal. Or run for president and sentence all panhandlers to a lifetime survivalesque punishment. Of course, you'll have to overthrow the government and create a new presidency to give yourself that kind of power, but that's okay; let your anger motivate you.

But, really, the end of this is, I totally sympathize.

-Marguerite St. Just

Dear Krisis,

I haven't taken that class, but I remembered that we had some previous answers that might help. Board Question #69453 says "Sewing 185 is a fun class. It is not, necessarily, an easy class. It takes a lot more work than you'd expect for the number of credits. When I took it, we made pajama pants, a skirt, and a button-down shirt." And in Board Question #63895, Genuine Article said "This class was incredibly hard and time consuming, but worth it. Wearing something you've made with your own two hands is a good feeling." So I think the verdict is that it's not especially easy, because it's fairly time-consuming, but it's fun and worth it if you're interested in sewing.

The School of Family Life has a page on the sewing labs, and it mentions that there are TAs who can help you and teach you, as well as very nice sewing machines. It's probably worth checking them out; you may decide that even with your own sewing machine, there are advantages to using the labs.

I'm not sure what the best way is to get over fear of pricking yourself. It might be helpful to try starting off a bit slower (you don't have to push the foot pedal all the way down), and with some practice you should get more accustomed to the needle. It might also help to realize that if you have the presser foot down, it's very difficult to accidentally get your finger in the wrong place.

Good luck with the class!

—Laser Jock

Dear Mico,

The name for the long ramp the ships are resting on is a slipway (also known as a "ways"). Most of the time you launch ships down the length of the ramp, just like you'd expect. However, if the channel of water (usually a river or a bay) isn't wide enough, then large ships may need to be launched sideways, like your video shows. You can imagine that between the slipway and the ship itself, plus needing room to maneuver, a river might not be wide enough. In fact, sometimes they even build the slipway itself along the shore, instead of perpendicular to it, to allow enough room; the drawback is that this takes up more room along the shore.

—Laser Jock

Dear Mico,

Slipways aren't always used to put ships into water. Drydocks and a few other methods are used too. I'm having trouble addressing your question of where you can go to watch ships being put into the water via slipways. I found some slipway-equipped shipyards in England, Denmark, Bangladesh, and Australia. I'm sure some exist in the U.S., but apparently American shipyards don't advertise their slipway capabilities online as much? I'll comment if I find some in the U.S.!

--Concealocanth

Dear pessimistic mood,

I've felt the same way more often than I'd like to admit, although I like to believe I'm getting a bit better. My universal solution in those moments, though, is "no matter how bad life is, the alternative is always even worse." Yeah, it's possible I'll end up stuck in a career that I hate, but it's a heck of a lot better than abandoning responsibility and being unemployed and penniless. Maybe I'm always going to struggle with forming relationships with other people, but it's a heck of a lot better than just giving up and being completely and permanently alone. Yes, I will probably be dealing with depression off and on in one form or another for the rest of my life, but even 50% happy is a heck of a lot better than 100% dead.

I'm going to disagree with your ice cream analogy here--like it or not, the ice cream's already bought. You can't take it back for a refund. So you can enjoy the 10% that's not disgusting, or you can throw it all out and get nothing. I don't know about you, but I'd go for the 10% every single time. Every. Single. Time. You're stuck on this ride called life whether you like it or not, and yeah, it gets miserable sometimes and there's not much you can do about that, but you still can choose whether to enjoy the good parts or throw them out. No matter how bad life is, the alternative is always even worse.

-yayfulness

Dear mood,

One of my favorite quotes is "The sorrow will outnumber the joys, but the joys will outweigh the sorrows." (If anyone knows who this is credited to, please feel free to comment.) That understanding that yes, life is filled with dreariness and drudgery, that it's usually not always rainbows and sunshine, but those rare moments of pure happiness make it all worth it.

I think part of the problem is that we desperately want life to be wonderful all of the time. We see people with lives we imagine are far more awesome than our own, and we feel a bit cheated when our lives aren't as great as we wish they'd be- or even expect them to be. One story that struck me from Gerald N. Lund's book Divine Signatures is about an old woman explaining the way society has changed over her life. Growing up, everyone knew that life was hard. Everyone's life was HARD. She then says that in the seventies, cashiers began saying "have a nice day," and suddenly everyone felt that they were entitled to a nice day. Let's make it clear: we are not entitled to this. Life is supposed to be hard. That's how we learn. You can find talk after talk about how it is only through trials that we grow.

Part of the reason I love the analogy of the old-time rail journey is that it is a journey. We are going somewhere! Yes, the ride itself may not be wonderful, even though parts of it are, but we must take the train in order to reach our destination.

Life is meant to be endured. Yes, it is meant to be enjoyed as well (thank you, President Hinckley), but that does not change the fact that endurance is tough sometimes. Those precious moments of happiness we find along the way is what keeps us moving on. Yes, it's hard.

As for your statement that "happiness never lasts," well, neither do showers, but we keep taking them, don't we?

-serendipity

Dear BYU fan,

My freshman year, there was this girl in my ward. She was taking 21 or 22 credits her first semester and doing great at it. She was fluent in multiple languages. She was gorgeous. She had a boyfriend and a large group of friends in the ward; she was friendly, funny, and universally liked. She quickly advanced through the ranks of the ballroom teams. Yes, for sure I became stupidly jealous of her. I couldn't even look her in the eye when I talked to her because her overwhelming superiority to me was so intimidating. Was she acting superior? Did she actually look down on me? No. I don't think so. It was all in my head. I'm sad I missed out on what might've been a great friendship because I envied her. I'm also sad I wasted time and energy being down on myself for not being as "good" as her. Comparison, as you said, is something we shouldn't do, but as I say, we do it all the time anyway. It's a lifelong battle for most of us, I think, to stop comparing. And that's okay.

Some talents, as you've also discovered, are way more obvious than others. The ability to handle a 22 credit course load is obvious. The ability to do well in a rigorous class is obvious. But no matter how talented or consistently lucky anyone appears, they're dealing with hardships and trials of their own, or are being prepared to deal with hardships and trials of their own. We're all on Earth to be tested, including the super geniuses with lucky streaks.

Though some of our trials are of our own doing, overall, we are sent what trials we need to grow closer to God. Our job is just to work with what we have. If you're not a natural scholar, maybe an important part of your life is learning how to learn. Or learning to overcome obstacles. We all have to learn those things, one way or another. In Luke 12:48, it says that to whom much is given much is required; those who really are having an easier time at any given minute are charged with more responsibility and helping those who are struggling at that given minute. We are all stretched beyond our abilities here. All of us. But we've been promised that if we're faithful, grace will make up for our deficiencies and our weaknesses will become strengths.

Specifically, in this situation, no, I don't think there's a conspiracy going on where a bunch of students too capable for BYU decided to go here just to show everyone else up. People choose to go to BYU for a lot of reasons. Some students who did well enough in high school to go to Ivy League schools chose to come here instead because of cost or because they preferred the LDS environment. Just as you'd like people to not question your motives, try not to jealously ascribe bad motives to people.

I understand it's hard to not judge or become jealous when, like you said, the results of the differences between people are very different and therefore seem unfair. Yes, it is hard to have to pay more money to redo classes you did poorly in. But this too shall pass! Your whole life isn't determined by the fact you're taking longer to graduate. Your whole eternal life is definitely not determined by it. And yes, it is kind of like "The Prince and the Pauper." I'm sure someone thinks you have it easy and would love to have your trials. But let's not waste anymore time wishing for each other's trials or talents. Let's build up from what we have!

--Concealocanth

Dear Desiring,

I think that in your case, where the best desire is there but is only one of many desires (none of which are bad!), the best solution is to get out there and do it! Nobody comes into their mission with perfect desires. It's something you have to learn. And if it's already one of your desires, then I think you'll be as capable as anyone of developing it and placing it in the forefront. I can think of no better way to develop the desire to share the saving power of the Gospel than to learn to know and love and have direct responsibility for people, something you will do abundantly as a missionary. The problem for prospective missionaries is not when the best desire is not at the forefront, it is when it is basically not present. I think you'll do great.

-yayfulness

Dear 22 Black,

You are sort of on the right track, but not quite all the way. Paypal is an online transfer of whatever currency you're using between accounts; PayPal just acts as a super-secure moderator in the transitioning of funds from one hand to another. You lose $X, the person gains $X. A Bitcoin is an actual currency, like the dollar, yen, or real. The value of a Bitcoin is determined by some crazy math during transactions (my coworker spent almost an hour trying to explain to me how it worked, and I was still having some trouble). They take a bit of heat for having really jumpy exchange rates and for not being accepted by many retailers here in the States, but people who have them have a lot of confidence in their future. In fact (and a big thanks to Genuine Article for this info), there's a documentary being made called Life on Bitcoin, where BYU graduate Austin Craig and his wife Beccy are daring to use only Bitcoin for the first 90 days of their marriage. The culture of Bitcoins is still developing, so keep your eyes peeled for news regarding them, and read the Wikipedia article for every last tiny detail.

-Tootles

Dear 22 Black,

Like Tootles pointed out, PayPal is a company that lets you make payments, but they're still in some other currency. In some regards, PayPal isn't that different from Visa or MasterCard: they just process payments and move money around. Furthermore, PayPal has a pretty bad reputation; they're notorious for freezing accounts of nonprofits and others with little explanation, and for really dragging their feet on making things right. (See here for some examples, and more links.)

In contrast, Bitcoin is a currency. And not one that someone "just made up": it's actually built on solid cryptographic principles, building on previous attempts to create a cryptocurrency, and whoever created it was fairly smart. (No one knows the identity of the creator; the original paper was published under a pseudonym.)

Why would anyone want to use Bitcoin? Unlike other currencies, you can send bitcoins directly to someone else online without a middleman. You don't need someone like PayPal, Visa, or Mastercard, skimming their percentage off the top. You just pay someone. This is part of the appeal.

How do you get them in the first place? You can either "mine" them yourself (by having your computer solve certain very hard mathematical problems, like Tootles mentioned, in order to discover new ones), or by simply exchanging some other currency (like dollars) for bitcoins at one of the exchanges.

In contrast to nearly every other currency, the creation of new bitcoins isn't controlled by a government or any other organization. There's no equivalent to the Federal Reserve, which controls U.S. currency and manipulates it to regulate inflation and such. That might seem kind of weird. However, there are rules; they're just inherent in the math that defines the system. For instance, the number of bitcoins is finite (21 million), and the remaining ones are getting harder and harder to discover (the last ones will be mined in 2140). Again, that's just a property of the system involved; no one can change it. This is in contrast to most other currencies, including the dollar; the U.S. government (and most other governments) can literally make more money anytime they want, which some people don't like. I'm not an economist, so I can't get into the consequences of things like limited supply, but it's at least interesting.

Bitcoin does currently have some problems, though:

• Like Tootles mentioned, the exchange rates fluctuate quite dramatically, which is problematic for a currency.
• A couple of popular sites that let you store your bitcoins have also had problems with money being stolen as the result of hacking, and there have been some scams.
• Not many places accept Bitcoin as payment yet.
• Mining your own is not currently viable unless you buy a very specialized FPGA or ASIC rig just for that purpose (using your laptop or desktop will cost you more in electricity than the value of the Bitcoins you'd get; early on this wasn't the case).

I don't personally own any Bitcoins because I'm risk-averse, and I won't say you should jump on the bandwagon either. However, it does have some real reasons for existing, and if nothing else, it's an interesting experiment. Given more time, it may become stable enough to be more viable. Personally, I would love to have a better way of making online payments without needing a middleman taking their cut.

For more of an introduction to Bitcoin you can check out this article from Wired (though its conclusions are two years old and somewhat out of date, the basics of how the system works haven't changed), or (for more details, and more recently) this one from Tom's Hardware.

—Laser Jock

Dear Lonely, 

Are you a Facebook Philanthropist?

-The Great Irritator

Dear LD,

You might try just liking the book, which seems to be an option.

Also, heads up: liking the Federalist Papers isn't really a Democrat thing. Like, most anyone can find stuff in the Federalist Papers that they like, but the left are pretty infrequent defenders of federalism.

No Dice

Dear They toll for thee,

Based on your description I see absolutely no reason why your wife couldn't wear her yukata to her cousin's wedding. Admittedly kimonos aren't very common in the United States, but a dress is a dress, and I don't think anyone who works at the temple will care what she's wearing so long as she's decent. This is a world-wide church, or so I'm told. I'd only be wary if the dress is in any way distracting (besides the cut of it that is). If it's an eye-watering shade of fluorescent green or rustles a lot when she moves, yeah, talk her out of it, but that's just good general advice for all the clothes she might own. To be on the safe side she could call ahead to the temple and ask, but I can't imagine they have a policy forbidding ethnic clothing. Also, just to be doubly safe, I think she ought to first ask her cousin if it's okay, because, you know, brides don't like being upstaged on their wedding day.

-Genuine Article

Dear Baby Seal,

In an odd coincidence, a guy in my ward posted this story on Facebook with the comment that the man in the story was the sealer for his temple wedding. So yes, they do happen to be LDS.

And now, a small pause for an Adorable Old People Moment.

--Maven

Dear The water gets Chuck Norris,

Here's a list of my Top 10 Favorite Apps for iPhone:

1. Geocaching. It's a little hard on your wallet (10 bucks), but is amazing fun. You can find out more about geocaching by looking it up on Wikipedia.
2. Words with Friends. It's basically free Internet Scrabble, and a great way to play one of the best games ever with friends around the world.
3. Angry Birds. For one dollar, this game is a mobile hit. If you've never heard of it, look it up on YouTube. No matter how silly or overly simple it looks, I promise you'll love it.
4. Facebook. WARNING: You will lose about 4 hours of time a day on this thing if you're not careful. But it's Facebook with you all the time. It's pretty great.
5. Google Maps. Back in my day (like when the iPhone first come out), the default Maps app was just Google Maps on iPhone. Since that is no longer the case, and the Apple Maps app isn't super great, you should definitely get the Google Maps app. It's free, and it's better.
6. Bad Piggies. Similar to Angry Birds, but with a different layout more focused on engineering and setup than just slingshotting. Like with Angry Birds, definitely worth the dollar.
7. iBooks. This is only a free bookshelf for books you buy through the iTunes store, but I've got 15-20 books on mine, and I love having them all in one tiny place to be opened on a whim. the books range from $5-15.
8. Pandora Radio. I'm certain you've heard of this. Free radio that sets up a station based on the artist/song/genre you give it. The ads can be annoying, and you can register and pay monthly to remove those, but I don't mind them, and it's a great way to find new music.
9. YouTube. 'Nuff said.
10. Shazam. This is another app great for discovering new music. Have you ever been somewhere and heard a song and thought, "This is great! I want to buy it. But how do I find out what it's called????" Shazam listens to a song and uses its database to find out which song it is. I love it, and if you like music, you definitely will too.

Also, there's a 100 Hour Board app available, and it's pretty great. There's still some features that are missing, but it's good for looking at the questions as they post each day. Happy app-ing!

-Tootles

Dear Paprika,

Sadly, looking through my iPhone and iPad, they are mostly games. Worse, they are games for my niece and nephew. I never before knew there were so many different ways to play with dragons, ballerinas and princesses.

My favorite of the more functional apps:

• Hulu
• Netflix
• Amazon Prime Video
• ShopShop (for shopping lists! Who doesn't love that?)
• Sleep Cycle (tracks how well you sleep. h/t to Hamilton for that one)
• LDS Tools
• LDS Hymns
• Gospel Library
• IMDb
• Fly Delta (or whatever airline you use. I fly Delta, so this is useful)
• RunPee (tells you the best time to leave movies for bathroom breaks)
• Kindle
• Yelp
• TripAdvisor
• WDW/DL Waits (so useful for Disney trips)

My favorite photography apps:

• Instagram (obviously -- what's the point of having photography apps if you aren't going to Instagram the pictures!)
• Diptic (it makes collages)
• PS Express (basic edits)
• Straighten
• SquareReady (it makes your picture a square so you don't have to cut anything out when you Instagram it)
• Camera+ (more editing)
• Snapseed (more editing)

My favorite game apps:

• Whirly Words
• The Tribez
• Tetris
• Whale Trail
• Bejeweled
• No Zombies Allowed
• Tiny Wings
• Tiny Tower
• Scamble with Friends
• Running with Friends
• Blockheads (like a simplistic Minecraft)

I've played Monopoly, Life and Oregon Trail with other people (Oregon Trail two player is we just take turns shooting stuff). Just like the real games, the virtual ones also end in fights.

My favorite kids apps:

• 123 Color HD (so many kids in church will want to sit by me to play it)
• Where's My Perry/Where's My Water (same game, different characters)
• When I Grow Up
• Whale Trail Jr
• Toca Hair Salon 2 (it's fun for kids and adults alike!)
• Toca Band
• Toca Tailor
• Scribblenauts
• Hungry Shark
• DoodleBuddy
• FatBooth/AgingBooth/BoothStache (I'm constantly amazed how long my nephew can play with these)
• Action Movie (everything in your life can be an action movie! Everything!!)

Toca actually makes a lot of apps, but those three are, in my opinion, the best.

And you should absolutely get Apps Gone Free. We've found things that we've loved there and since they're free, you feel no guilt deleting them if you hate them.

-Marguerite St. Just

Dear You,

I've only ever heard engaged or married people call each other "cutesy names." Once upon a time I was with Past Boyfriend when "honey" accidentally slipped out. It was really awkward because it felt like PB and I were a whole lot more committed to each other than we really were. I don't recommend it, especially when you haven't been dating that long. 

-Squirrel

Dear Sugar Pie Honey Bunch,

I'm going to disagree with Squirrel and say that cutesy name calling is not exclusively for engaged and married couples. If you're not comfortable enough with someone to call them "baby," you're not gonna feel comfortable being engaged to them. Your difficulty is this: to you, this isn't a nonchalant or casual thing. For me it's always been something natural, so it's never been hard, but the fact that you are scared means that you won't be able to do it in a relaxed manner. It really just depends on each person's personality. I've also been in relationships where my significant other didn't return that kind of affection at first, but they didn't mind it, and they got around to it later. Once again, it didn't bug me, because I was relaxed and natural about it. I would give it some time until you relax a bit about it, maybe give the relationship a bit more time so it won't be such a big deal to you and it can be something more normal. Just go with your feelings on this and it'll work out fine.

-Tootles

Dear Baby,

So, in response to what Tootles wrote I feel I have to say that I've been married for over 5 years and don't do the whole cutesy nickname thing. We're plenty comfortable around each other, because, come on, five years, but I can't bring myself to call my husband by a pet name because it's so...not us. We sometimes use them ironically (sugar-lumpkins being our favorite), and he sometimes calls me sweetie in all seriousness, but for the most part it's just not something we do. What I'm trying to say is, not everyone likes pet names, so don't take it personally if he doesn't go for being called honey.

I understand you like the idea of pet names and want to try it out, so I say go ahead and drop a cutesy name and see how he reacts. Above all, be casual. Act like it's the most natural thing in the world to call a grown man "baby." Just don't do it solely because your friends are, because that isn't healthy. You shouldn't push your relationship faster than it wants to go.

-Genuine Article

P.S. I told my husband about your question. His response? "We might do well, as a human race, to take some of the romance out of love."

Dear Baby,

If it's in your personality, go ahead and say it!  If it's not the kind of thing that seems like it would naturally fit with the kind of person you are around your new beau, he most likely will find it out-of-character and uncomfortable.

I have male friends who call me "dear" and "doll," and started doing so soon after becoming friends with them.  I'm a rather standoffish person in relationships of the friendly or romantic variety, which means I rarely use pet names, but since they just felt so comfortable with the word usage, I took it as a natural thing and felt flattered.  In romantic relationships, I've only dated a small handful of people--but the ones who wanted to use pet names just started using them in dense conversation (you know, the kind where you're just talking and laughing and talking a lot) so that it felt natural and not weird.  If they had gone for a more out-of-the-blue pet name usage, yes, it would have been awkward.  I also got lucky in that I have never been expected by a pet-namer to reciprocate the pet-naminess.  Huzzah!

And from that anecdotal evidence, I have created for you...

Yog in Neverland's Fantastic Guide to Relationships (Based Fully on Pet Name Acceptance)!

1) Make sure communication with your lover is nice and open

2) In the midst of a nice, happy moment, throw it into natural conversation.  If things don't go well, go to step 3.  If things do, go to step 4.

3) If things get awkward, say, "Oh, I just feel more comfortable calling you that.  If you feel like it is a signal of some sort of commitment you're not ready for, I'll try not to use it!"

4) If things go well, keep using it for a bit and then maybe bring up that you just like calling him by pet names, and make sure he is okay with it.

5) If he doesn't feel comfortable with it, feel okay slipping it into conversation once every 2-3 weeks to a month, then catching yourself and saying, "Oh, sorry, do you still feel uncomfortable with pet names?"

6) If he just straight up doesn't like them, and you do enough that it bothers you to not feel comfortable dating him anymore, tell him!  And then evaluate the relationship from there.

7) Tailor the above steps to suit your situation as needed.

Ta-da!  You're set.  I wish you luck, and if any of this advice causes you any problems, we offer double your money back and 0% financing!*

-Yog in Neverland

*Or something like that.  Fine print and jazz should be here but seeing as we have no real financing and we never get money from our readers as payment for our answers, there's not much fine print to put anywhere.  Except for the fine print that says that we don't need fine print.

Dear George,

Well, if your iPod is an iPod Touch, you could download the app and watch it on that. However, if you're like me and have an iPod Classic, the answer is no.

-Ace

Dear Ajisai

Before the days of technology, I used to keep track of "Books Worth Reading" by recording the title, author, and genre in the back of my journal. Once upon a time I had a list of all the books I'd read in 6th and 7th grade as part of the Accelerated Reader program, but I'm very saddened to say that it got lost somewhere. I really wish I could see that again! These days I try to keep track using Goodreads, but I didn't join the website until 2009, so I know there are a ton of books I haven't recorded. Goodreads says I've read 271 books, but that is a gross underestimate of everything I've actually read.

I haven't added any picture books (a.k.a. kid's books), reference books, or textbooks on Goodreads, but if I wouldn't mind counting picture books. I don't include books that I started but didn't finish; they have their own categories which I designate "Stalled" and "Will Not Finish."

--Maven

Dear Vashta Nerada,

As part of a project to provide book suggestions for people, I made a fairly comprehensive book list of every book I'd read in the past years. This was back in 8th grade, and it ended up being several hundred books long. However, because of the amount of books I read, I gave up on keeping track. (When you read ten to fifteen books a week during the summers growing up, you don't really want to keep track.) I didn't add picture books, and I don't think I would, unless they were particularly spectacular; I'm in love with Press Here by Herve Tullet. Personally, I wouldn't add books I didn't finish or that I only read small parts of (reference books included).

I kind of regret not having written down all of the books I've read, but at the same time, I feel like the list would be too long.

-Tally M.

Dear Inquiring Mindless,

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who ever saw the movie Hook. That movie defined my childhood; our VHS of it was basically played out by the time I turned 12. Anyway, my favorite character from the whole movie was, without a doubt, Tootles. At about 21 minutes and 50 seconds in, some very exciting events start happening (I won't spoil it for you), and Tootles exclaims, "Hook! Hook! Hook!" When I was thinking about my Board email address, I realized that you can spell Tootles with a "d" instead of the second "t", and it basically sounds the same. That could get confusing, so instead of the old standby of just having my email be my 'nym, I decided on the work "hook" three times. It's simpler, easy to spell, and puts a smile on my face every time I say it.

-Tootles

Dear PJ,

Well, we did have this giant, basically abandoned fiber optics network beneath the city that has been passed around between companies, and is probably well known among communications businesses in the West as a result. There aren't really a lot of cities that already have a huge abandoned network just waiting to be picked up and used. I'm not involved with Google, but I imagine that to be their reasoning. The purchase of the network only costs one dollar for Google, so even though they have to pay to upgrade the system, it's probably still a great deal for them. Just enjoy the fact that super-fast internet is comin' to P-town!

-Tootles

Dear Basil,

Most of my information will come from Insure.com's article, "When your friend crashes your car: The rules of auto liability."

Basically, if your friend crashes your car (and the damage is minor), your insurance should still cover it.

If your friend crashes your car and hurts someone/something, your insurance should initially cover it, and then can seek partial compensation from your friend's insurance.

If your friend borrowed your car without telling you, then the fault lies on your friend.

If someone steals your car and crashes it, you are only liable to fix your own car.

Granted, I'm not an insurance agent, so it would probably be safe to call your own insurance agent to double check and find out more.

-Marguerite St. Just

Dear Pastapus,

The Word of Wisdom prohibits the use of tobacco, coffee, tea, strong drinks, and addictive or harmful substances. Nicotine is an addictive substance, and is in fact the key factor in cigarette addiction. So even though it's not a cigarette, and there's no official church statement regarding it, I still don't think it's a good idea.

As a side note, I know people who have used electronic cigarettes to overcome an addiction to smoking, by gradually using it less and less, sort of like a nicotine patch. My mission president taught that the Church's policy on addiction recovery was quitting cold turkey; on a personal level, I think most methods of overcoming addiction are great. I actually have a close friend who is using an electronic cigarette to overcome a smoking addiction, and I think it's great that he's making that effort.

Just to finish up, Yog in Neverland also pointed out to me that using an electronic cigarette does go against the gospel directive to avoid the appearance of evil. It's not necessary to put that substance into your body, and it can negatively affect the example you set for people if you do use it.

-Tootles

Dear You Easily Owe Me A Dollar,

Why does it have to be feasible?

My feasible date will start at Conceal O'Canth's house where we will be eating light appetizers and each couple will bring a dessert of our choice (my date and I bring either creme brulee or key lime pie tarts). While we're eating, we'll watch the 25th anniversary edition of Phantom of the Opera (because I love that one and I want Conceal O'Canth to see it). Everyone will be super impressed by how on-key all the singers are (unlike the singers in another unnamed musical that recently-ish came out).

After dessert and before our game, which involved the monkeys from the Barrel of in new and interesting ways that Conceal O'Canth made up (someone should definitely ask her about this game she's making up), we'll discuss weird jobs we've had. I'll mention my three years in Membership and some of the weird calls and how I had to be tested on the policy manual. This, of course, will lead to me explaining important differences between a disfellowshipment, excommunication and annotation -- which is the most interesting policy thing anyway, in my opinion. And everyone else will have interesting work stories as well and we'll all enjoy eating, laughing and playing the new monkey game.

My non-feasible one (because I love those better) will involve the guy owning a plane and flying me to NYC to see Cinderella (so many good reviews!). On the plane we'll play Barrel of Monkeys to see if turbulence affects the game - it does not, we are just that good.

When we arrive, we have a wonderful evening at the show. While eating our post-show dark chocolate and pear tart from Once Upon a Tart (NYC food tours, everyone! Best three hours of my life!), he'll declare his passionate love for me and say he wants to marry me, but it will have to be a civil marriage because the First Presidency will take too long to approve his sealing clearance (he's been married before for this to work, obviously) and I will say, "It takes a week, usually less." Then we will descend into awkward silence as he realizes he can't out-policy me but doesn't want to confess his real reason for a civil marriage. This will be the perfect time for me to explain sealing and sealing clearance policies to him.

And we'll probably get married anyway because he flew me to see a show and that makes me swoon. Also because he is wildly attractive, a great kisser, has a wonderful sense of humor and an absolute gentleman because fantasy dates are the best.

-Marguerite St. Just

Dear Basil,

Drive to Temple Square and walk around, seeing the Church Office Building and discussing interesting tidbits about Church policy before heading to Capitol Theater to see a traveling company of a Broadway show, then going to a cute restaurant for dessert after where, in case conversation lags, you break out the game Barrel of Monkeys from your pocket and charmingly play at your table till dessert comes.

Not to detract from MSJ's answer, but besides the Barrel of Monkeys part, this was almost literally a date I did several times in high school.

Just saying: it's pretty darn feasible.

- Rating Pending (who, having grown old and jaded, seeing high schoolers playing Barrel of Monkeys at a restaurant would more likely elicit a groan than anything else)

Dear Nikon,

I'm sad you said modern. I was hoping you could recreate Hogwarts rooms in your new warehouse and use it as a haunted house during October. I would visit your house for sure.

Also you would need secret passageways. Everywhere. Behind bookshelves, false doors, tapestries on the wall, rotating fireplaces; the whole works! That would be the best use of a warehouse home ever.

You might be interested in becoming friends with these people who built their minimalist dream home (appropriately on a HGTV show called "Dream House" -- would that I could find the episodes for you -- they were amazing). Their home consisted of things like concrete. For everything. Walls, floors, beds (probably...I wouldn't put it past them!), you name it. Wooden slat bridges, open rooms (walls are bad. Avoid walls. Unless they are plant walls because those are amazing), lots of windows, lots of squares (no fancy curved lines!), and, of course, a wood-burning stove. Because that is just awesome in any house. Be sure your stairs are either floating concrete or some sort of metal. I would love up-cycled railroad track stairs (preferably for a rail line that's out of use, but let your conscience be your guide).

Either everything should match or nothing should match. There is no in between.

Make sure the inside flows well with the outside. Add courtyards, make the lines the same and put in lots of decks. Rocks and grass inside? Perfect. Showers and kitchens outside? Absolutely, yes!

Remember, if any part of your house or furnishings looks or feels comfortable, you're doing it wrong. I mean, look at these people; they've got the right idea.

If you want other ideas for super cool things, you could watch the show Eureka (on Netflix!).

-Marguerite St. Just

Dear Curious Skeptic,

You're right to be skeptical, because legally you must signal. According to the Utah Driver Handbook (pages 19-20), you must signal for at least two seconds before you reach the turning point. There is no exception for specified turning lanes.

--Maven, also reminding you to CHECK YOUR BLIND SPOTS before changing lanes!

Dear Skeptic,

Also, regardless of its legal status, signaling is a common courtesy and people should just do it.

-yayfulness

Dear Mr. Slant,

Walgreens sells a variety of earwax removal products. But really I think you should just get the WaxVac, because it "just makes sense!"

For the removal of earwax, WebMD recommends 

Over-the-counter wax softening drops such as Debrox or Murine may be put into the affected ear and then allowed to drain out after about five minutes while holding the head to the side, allowing the drops to settle. Sitting up again will let the drops drain out by themselves.

Or

A bulb-type syringe may be used to gently flush the ear with warm water. The water should be at body temperature to help prevent dizziness.

They also state that "blockage can be prevented by avoiding the use of cotton-tipped swabs or Q-tips and other objects that push the wax deeper into the ear canal."

-Azriel

Dear Dori,

I checked with a friend from Rexburg, who told me the following:

Most of the places I can think of are by rivers or streams... It is Idaho, after all. A place close to Sugar City called Monkey Rock is fun and doesn't seem dangerous as long as you stay below the waterfall. Rigby Lake is nice but a bit crowded (it's a man made lake right next to the highway), and reportedly is a perfectly fine place to swim. There are also a few places by rivers with bigger currents (like Fall River right off the highway in between St. Anthony and Ashton). Those are the places I have been to. There's more than enough rivers to swim/tube in. There's also another place just northwest of Rexburg (the Teton River off of 2000 W) where people like to bridgejump. It's also a fun, slow river to go tubing at.

Hopefully one of those places will work for you!

-yayfulness

Dear Pimpernel,

I happen to have a great fondness for the "Pop _____" genre.  Though I wish I had a better way of describing the genre because the adjective "pop" feels like it expresses a certain....pandering quality.  And I certainly don't feel that any of these authors must lose anything in rigor (though there are plenty that do).  The real trick is trying to differentiate the books of the genre that maintain the rigor and suppress bias from the ones that claim to present truth but in actuality present an extremely skewed view of reality.

Having been schooled in math and science I tend to read more about the social sciences (psychology, sociology, and history in particular), but I do have some good recommendations from the hard sciences as well.  For completeness and for other interested parties I'll include a list of my favorites across the genre.

For you, the harder sciences:

• How Risky is it, Really? - David Ropeik -- Understanding risk and statistics, psychology included
• The Evolution of Cooperation - Robert Axelrod -- Game theory
• Prisoner's Dilemma - William Poundstone -- Game theory, another perspective
• A Brief History of Time - Stephen Hawking -- Modern physics and quantum mechanics
• The Double Helix - James D. Watson -- More historical, but the development of understanding DNA's structure
• Secrets & Lies - Bruce Schneier -- Computer and network security and cryptography
• "Reflections on Trusting Trust" - Ken Thompson -- Not a book; a speech that explores what software is and what it can do
• Think Python: How to Think like a Computer Scientist - Allen B. Downey -- Introduction to Programming, a bit outside the genre, but you may like it anyway (and it's FREE!)

I'm surprised I don't have more from the hard sciences, but I suspect it has mainly to do with having schooled in the subjects. I have plenty of books about software development, mathematics, and physics, but they're geared towards those in the field and don't really fit the genre being discussed.

My other recommendations for the pop non-fiction genre:

• The Man Who Lied to His Laptop - Clifford Nass
• The Design of Everyday Things - Donald A. Norman
• Collapse - Jared Diamond
• Stumbling on Happiness - Daniel Gilbert
• The Paradox of Choice - Barry Schwartz
• Guns, Germs, and Steel - Jared Diamond
• NurtureShock - Po Bronson & Ashley Merryman
• The Smart Swarm - Peter Miller
• A Perfect Mess - Eric Abrahamson and David H. Freedman
• The Guns of August - Barbara W. Tuchman
• Krakatoa - Simon Winchester
• 1776 - David McCullough
• The Great Bridge - David McCullough
• The Johnstown Flood - David McCullough
• Sleights of Mind - Stephen L. Macknik and Susana Martinez-Conde
• Failure is not an Option - Gene Krantz
• Pretty much all of Malcom Gladwell's books

Goodreads also has some lists which you might find helpful:

• Pop-Physics Books
• Pop-Math Books
• Pop-Biology Books
• Popular Science Books

-Curious Physics Minor

Dear Percy,

"Though they are not known for their scholastic rigor . . ." Exactly how many Pulitzer Prizes does David McCullough have to win in order to earn your respect?

Besides CPM's excellent list, I'll just add a few more:

For astronomy/astrophysics, you should check out something by Neil deGrasse Tyson. I've have people recommend Death by Black Hole and Other Cosmic Quandaries as well as Origins: Fourteen Billion Years of Cosmic Evolution. You might also enjoy A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson who is an author of humorous books but who talks to a whole scad of experts and scientists. It's entertaining and it definitely covers a lot of huge concepts (starting with The Big Bang) in a very approachable way.

For history/anthropology you should read Guns, Germs and Steel by Jared Diamond (I know CPM already hit this one but it's really good).

And for biology/natural history (with absurdly anthropomorphic titles), you could check out Rabid: A Cultural History of the World's Most Diabolical Virus by Bill Wasick and Monica Murphy, or Wicked Bugs and Wicked Plants by Amy Stewart, about poisonous or destructive insects and plants that dramatically impacted human history.

- Rating Pending (who, in all honesty, is more excited to read Dad is Fat by comedian Jim Gaffigan which was a super great Father's Day present)

Dear Hipster,

It's probably Recreation Management (RECM) 223R. RECM 223R has multiple sections that cover different topics depending on the person teaching the class and the semester that it's offered. For example, next semester they're offering Hiking and Survival and Wilderness Trek, which may cover the topics you're interested in. You can check out course descriptions for these classes here.

--Maven

Dear electromagnetic,

Er... that seems like a pretty complete list to me. Other than roommates and Brigham's Yard Sale, I don't know of any good places to buy secondhand goods in Provo.

--Concealocanth

Dear No Baby,

I have no clue as to whether or not that's normal. What I'd recommend is keeping the information close—tell people, but don't make it a Facebook post. I'd start with your closest friend, and see if that satisfies your need to share. Obviously, it's an extremely personal experience, so it doesn't need to be broadcast. As far as bringing it up, whenever I need to tell somebody something important, I start with the very straightforward line, "I have something to tell you." Then I share the information, and usually I'll explain why I think they were an appropriate person to tell. It hasn't backfired yet, so I'd recommend that strategy.

-Ace

Dear White,

I think the issue has more to do with respect for authority figures than race or socio-economic status. I can't comment on how normal "yo" is, but I can tell you that one of my biggest annoyances with auto-correct on my phone is that it always changes "yo" to "to" when I want to use "yo." I'm pretty much as white as can be, from predominately white town, so I'm going to argue that it's not solely a minority thing. However, I would never dream of addressing a teacher that way. It's very much slang and not appropriate when addressing a superior

-Ace