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Posts for July 2, 2009
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Q Dear 100 Hour Board,

How long has the church been using the standard black and white missionary badges/nametags that it uses now? How about just badges at all?

- Sister me
Direct Link to Question


A Dear Sister,

The current design of name tags is relatively new, at least if you are talking about picky things like font layout and stuff. Looking at my dad's missionary nametags, the font is different from mine and he has the name of his mission, which I understand is only done for the Salt Lake missions now. My Uncle, who served in England about fifteen years ago, has a font style different from both mine and my dads. When the Church decided to emphasize the Jesus Christ in their logo, the name tags changed.

My dad got his tags in the mission field and they were custom done for him, so I understand. That was way back in 1977, and his brother in the Philippines had name tags in 1974. I saw a picture of Mitt Romney in 1968 and he didn't have a name tag, but that was in France so who knows what the policy was. Another source (Vorpal Blade from the message board, if you know him) confirmed that missionaries in Italy didn't have name tags as of 1968.

My dad, illustrious fount of knowledge that he is, said that Salt Lake missionaries have had tags since the 1960s but he didn't know anyone who had served their mission outside of Utah at that time. I did a check on LDS.org and the oldest mention of missionary name tags was from an Improvement Era story in 1972. I imagine it couldn't have been too much before 1970. If anyone has any better information, i.e. if we have any older readers with further enlightenment I would love a clarifying e-mail.

Dr. Smeed


A Dear Sister You,

I did some scouting around to see what other information I could find--surely there is a record of this somewhere, right?   Anyway, after about a hundred phone calls that seemed to just run in circles, all I can do is back up Dr. Smeed's answer.   Nobody seems to know when the Church officially began using name tags for the missionaries, nor where to find that information.   The man I talked to at the Salt Lake missionary department said that he didn't have a name tag when he was a missionary in 1970, but his coworker (who served in 1967) did.   So it seems that many individual missions began using them before it became a standardized practice.

I also emailed Mike Hunter, the Chair of the Religion Department in the library, and he said the change occurred sometime after 1970, but still had no exact dates.   And he suggested contacting the Church missionary department...so, yeah, lots of circles.   I finally tried calling the company that manufactures the name tags, to see when they started making them, but they haven't gotten back to me yet.   If I find any more information, I'll be sure to post it.   In the meantime, congrats on asking a question that apparently has never been asked before.   LDS Missionary Name Tags: A History is just waiting to be written by you!

-Miss Scarlett, in the Conservatory



Q Dear Waldorf and Sauron,

In Board Question #52375, you said you had a fool-proof way to get rid of hiccups. What is it?

- shebec
Direct Link to Question


A Dear Shebec,

I'm pretty sure Sauron answered the way he did just to see how many people would ask for the hiccup trick. Five did. You were the first, so yours gets posted.

So here's the trick. It's simple, and you may have to repeat it a couple of times, but it really is effective:
  • Gulp as much air as you think you can hold
  • Hold it in
  • Sip in a little more air
  • A little more
  • Keep taking tiny sips of more and more air until you absolutely can't hold any more
  • Hold for as long as you think you can
  • Hold just a second longer
  • Release
  • Repeat as needed
This answer comes with a money-back guarantee.

Good luck,
Waldorf and Sauron



Q Dear 100 Hour Board,

What should a non-golfer do with 100 used golf balls?

- Birdie
Direct Link to Question


A Dear Birdie,

The thought that jumps IMMEDIATELY to mind is learn how to golf! Having that many golf balls will give you a leg up on learning to drive. Most golf courses (in fact, all of the golf courses I have been to) allow you onto their driving range for free, you just need to pay for each basket of balls. If you come equipped with 100 balls, it's a free afternoon!

For a more fun twist on that, procure a golf club or two ($3 a piece at DI) and go out to Utah Lake and hit them off the dock into the lake. That made for many a fun mission afternoon when my apartment was a couple blocks from the ocean. Just hit to your heart's content and watch out for boats! If you are not a golfer you may not have the endurance to hit 100 golf balls, so take a friend!

Other things you can do if you are not sports minded in the least are;
• Making snowman dioramas
• Cutting a bunch of them open to see what the inside of different golf balls look like
• Learning to juggle 100 golf balls, or teaching 33 friends to juggle three balls each
• A heck of a white elephant gift!
• If you live in an apartment building with a stairwell, cordoning off the stairwell and pouring them down the stairs. Enjoy the ensuing sound (this would have been AWESOME in Deseret Towers)
• Get a metal box (like a Danish butter cookie tin) and put a few into it. Tape it shut and put it in the spare tire well of a friend's car, or hide it somewhere else it will make a lot of noise and not be found easily
• Making a GIANT bingo ball dispenser and using it for bingo or raffles or something like that
• Get some model paint and wooden dowels and make six really small billiard sets
• If the golfing balls into Utah Lake idea doesn't strike your fancy, get some medical-style elastic band and make a catapult. Shoot balls into the lake
• Buy a bunch of hockey masks and glue the golf balls into the eye holes in amusing positions and with amusing expressions
• If all else fails and you get sick of having so many, you can make about $.25 selling them to Play It Again Sports. It won't cover the gas required to get there, but it gets you twenty-five cents more than if you had, say, donated them to a high school golf team or something. If you can hang on to them for two more months, I will take them off you hands for DOUBLE what I imagine Play It Again will pay you for them

Above all, be careful with whatever you do. Don't throw them into windshields or anything. Let me know what you decided to do with them!


Dr. Smeed



Q Dear 100 Hour Board,

Will the fans of Michael Jackson who sold out his 50 concerts in London all get refunds?

-Mr. Left
Direct Link to Question


A Dear Mr. Left-

Yes, they will. Obviously, Jacko's concerts are canceled, and it just wouldn't be right to keep all of the money for shows you can't deliver. According to this article, they're already working on how to refund all $85 million in sales; a logistical nightmare, I'm sure.

The Kid is Not My Son,
-Foreman


A Dear Mr.,

It looks like fans who had bought tickets will also have the option of souvenir tickets, if they'd rather have those than the refund.   The eight designs were apparently conceived by Michael Jackson; if I were making the choice, I think I'd probably give up the $100+ for a souvenir like that.   But just one.

—Laser Jock



Q Dear WALL-E Fans,

For the life of me, I can't understand the attraction of the movie WALL-E.   With a recent question, where much praise was once again laid upon this movie, I can't fathom why this (to me) boring piece of film was given so many accolades by so many (not just 100 board members).   I could barely stand to get through the movie.   Thank goodness my DVD player can play with sound and dialogue at 1.5 speed and it took less time to suffer through, but I kept waiting for "the good part."   It never happened to me.

Can someone explain the fascination with this, my LEAST favorite Pixar movie?   A Bug's Life would win in a showdown with WALL-E any day.

- Brother "Two Thumbs Down" Grumpy
Direct Link to Question


A Dear Brother Grumpy,

You know, my brother had the same reaction to Wall-E.   He thought it was incredibly long, boring, and pointless.   I sort of find that response ironic, because the main point I got out of the movie was the idea that as humans, we do so much to speed things up and make things convenient that we've leached the happiness out of life, forgetting to enjoy the simple things.   I think you unintentionally just played into the movie's message.

When I went to see Wall-E, I didn't have high expectations, because it was about a non-speaking robot, for goodness' sake!   I ended up being completely blown away, though, by the beauty of the animation.   It was a refreshing change, I thought, to follow a story almost purely through images.   Without dialogue, the movie creators were able to show Wall-E as a compassionate, hard-working, and even romantically-minded robot.   When was the last time you had compassion for a piece of machinery?   I even got sad each time his pet roach almost died!  

To me, it just takes incredible talent to be able to convey thoughts and emotions just by imagery and music alone.   The concept is so utterly different from the kinds of movies and TV shows that we watch today, where dialogue is usually force-fed down our throats at break-neck speeds (think Gilmore Girls), the plot is completely laid out for us, and you don't even have to think about what you're watching--it's just there.  

In a movie like Wall-E, where you have to read the visual clues to understand what's going on, I think it makes the viewer much more connected to the characters, and it can be a much deeper experience.   I think you should give the movie another try, keeping an open mind and watching how the story unfolds, instead of waiting for the dialogue to tell you what to think and feel.   Watch it with a little kid, if you can, and I think you'll get more out of it.

-Miss Scarlett, in the Conservatory


A Dear Grumpy,

If you use that fast-forward "feature," you've missed the entire film!   Film is different from all other visual media in one way: motion and duration.   If you speed it up you distort the motion and lose the duration and you might as well not watch it at all.   Not to mention the fact that nearly all comedy depends so much on perfect timing... try putting your favorite comedy film in at 1.5 speed and see if you laugh.   Seriously, never use that button ever again.

The "good part" is, in my opinion, the first act, or the part of the film before they go into space.   Try to sit back, put your watch away, and pay attention to the imagery.   It's extremely meditative, but every shot has significance that you might miss if you don't pay a lot of attention.   The background of every shot is just as important as the foreground, so there are actually two stories going on. One is simply Wall-e cleaning up, collecting things, and befriending the cricket and Eve.   This story is cute, emotive, and slapstick, like a Chaplin silent film.   Watch how every piece of this story is told entirely through the visuals and sound, and not the dialogue.   That kind of visual storytelling is extremely difficult and extremely rare.   It takes more effort on the part of the audience, but it's effort that is richly rewarded.

The other story is the question of how did the world get like this, and what happened to all the people?   This story is not told in some introductory montage with narration.   With the exception of the Buy-n-low advertisements ("there's plenty of space in space"!) it comes across entirely through the background details.   Like all good science fiction, is actually about something— and I don't just mean robots in space.   It's about humanity's relationship to technology.   It's a polemic against corporatism and consumerism.   It asks what if our lust for immediate gratification makes us not only lazy, fat, wasteful, and stupid, but also lose our home planet and our very humanity.   Wall-E's world is a rather depressing place, where every inch testifies to the vices of humanity—or rather American culture.   Notice the how the dominant colors—the drab, hopeless, dirty browns, reds, oranges, and yellows of the garbage-filled city—are suddenly upset by the glowing green spout of hope.   The background story is developed even more once they get onto the Axiom— if you're just following Wall-E's story of trying to get Eve back, you're missing the extremely rich social commentary conveyed through the environment on the Axiom.

Now, if neither of those story threads interest you, then maybe it isn't a film that's going to entertain you.   But just because it's not entertaining doesn't mean you can't learn something valuable from it.   So go back to it, keep your hands off the remote, relax, and look around.   Maybe you'll find your experience like the woman whose screen turns off when Wall-e bumps her: you'll gasp, finally see the dense and dizzy sights and sounds, and remark, "I didn't know we had a pool!"

Love,
Waldorf and Sauron


A Dear Grumpy,

1. The fact alone that Wall-E has sporks and bubble wrap was enough for me.

2. The only other person I've heard give such disdain for Wall-E loves (and I mean loves) ABC Family original movies, which blows my mind.

3. Wall-E is the only movie my youngest brother has perhaps ever sat through attentively.

4. Wall-E the character has incredible depth for someone who doesn't talk. He's endlessly optimistic, very loyal, kind, friendly, caring, innocent, awkward, and persistent. He's the pure of heart underdog hero you just can't help but love.

Give the guy a chance.

-habiba


A Dear Grumpy,

I also just couldn't resist saying that Wall-E totally trashed A Bug's Life in the showdown.   Sorry, bud!

-Miss Scarlett



C Dear 100 Hour Board,

In response to Board Question #52460 about recycling clothing, you may want to call Deseret Industries and other charities anyway. When I lived up in Logan, a representative of Humanitarian Aid came. She said that they do take clothing that is ripped and otherwise unusable because they sell them the the "Rag Man" who sends it on to those who recycle cloth into things like carpet matting and stuff.

They may not advertise it because of the shear amount of dead material they would have to sort through to get the nuggets that can be sold in the stores or are acceptable for shipping out in the Humanitarian bundles.

I know this policy exists in Logan. I can't guarantee it exists here in Provo. Call to make sure.

- Ageless
Direct Link to Question
 
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