Dear ladies of the Board,
When nature calls, pants can only go down, and dresses can only go up. Which way are you supposed to go with skirts?
-trying not to be awkward
Up if it's short, down if it's long.
-The Great Compromiser
Dear 100 Hour Board,
How to you get to be a student manager of a BYU team? Is this a thing?
-The Happiness Managing the BYU Basketball Team Would Bring Me
Dear would-be student manager,
The basketball team does indeed have student managers. If you specifically want to be involved with men's basketball, try emailing a cover letter and resume to Cody Fueger, the team's director of operations. And if for some reason you decide you want to be involved with a different team, you can probably find whoever you need to talk to on this list of contact info for the athletic department staff.
Dear Doctor Who fans of the 100 Hour Board,
What did you think of the 50th Anniversary Special? Did you have any favorite moments/lines? Any least favorites?
First of all, read TEN's comments. I totally approve of them.
Second of all, Capaldi.
Third of all, I really appreciated all of the nods to past Doctor Who episodes, Classic and New. I was fangirling the entire time, and not just because I got to see David Tennant again. The thing with Doctor Who is that it's entirely possible to not have things completely resolved. This episode, however, allowed us to have a small glimpse of things making complete sense. Even if they didn't intend this special from the beginning, Moffat did a very wonderful job of piecing a lot of Doctor Who canon together.
Also, I'm not too excited for Christmas because Matt Smith is leaving. But I am excited to see the Doctor grow up a little.
It wasn't perfect, but I loved it anyway. The writers certainly did what they set out to do—there's another 50 years in this show now, no question. The only thing I didn't particularly like was that I felt the Zygon subplot didn't get fully resolved; it got dropped in the negotiation phase and never wrapped up. Other than that, very entertaining. All those Easter eggs, we finally got the story behind the Queen Elizabeth gags (those go way back), the fez is back, all of it.
Ten is pretty much the best Doctor ever, so it was great to have David Tennant back for an episode, and John Hurt did a fantastic job as well. Matt Smith was great, as usual. The interactions between any of those three were just golden, and the entire episode is incredibly quotable. I was going to pick a favorite line but couldn't come up with just one, so here are the first two moments I thought of:
Clara: Doctor, what's going on?
Eleven: It's a... timey-wimey thing.
War Doctor: Timey what? Timey-wimey?
Ten: I-I've no idea where he picks that stuff up.
Eleven: Hey. Look. The round things!
Ten: I love the round things.
Eleven: What are are the round things?
Ten: No idea.
I went back and started watching early episodes (early in the reboot, not Classic Who) for background noise while doing homework today. Not only did I get nothing done, but Christopher Eccleston's Doctor makes so much more sense now. I know the writers probably didn't have this whole plot worked out back in 2005, but the 50th anniversary special did a wonderful job of tying things up. The continuity in Doctor Who is really something. And I'm beginning to like Nine now that I really understand where he's coming from.
That was difficult to write without being incredibly spoilerific.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
I recently found out that someone has been copying my blog. As in, not just copying some text or some posts, but his blog is an EXACT (minus the template) replica of my blog. To illustrate, my blog this: TutorialGeek and the cloned blog is here: Budak Dunia Maya.
I don't know whether I should be upset, or just confused. The whole thing just seems a bit odd to me. My questions are these:
1. How is he doing this?
2. Why would someone do this?
3. Should I take any action (like send him a message or report him to Internet police)?
I do freelance work, and this kind of stuff happens all the time to my work. People see that you're getting a lot of hits or that your knowledge of SEO really reflects in your work and they just rip the entire piece or collection so that search engines index them at or above your own work, which drives the traffic to him or her instead of you. Often you're one of many, many victims since the perpetrators often use software and programs that allow them to simply copy content en masse and use it elsewhere. Contacting the potential thief is difficult and in most instances you will go ignored. The route most writers on the internet take is that of the DMCA takedown. The Digital Millennium Copyright Act helps protect your work online and by filing a notice with an agent, the infringing website will be removed. This article is the best I've found in telling you how to go about filing a DMCA. It may be time-consuming, but depending on the traffic your blog was receiving (and potential revenue, if you have an AdSense account), it's worth it!
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Why would a parent name their child Troublemaker?
I didn't know that Nelson Mandela's given name meant troublemaker. How appropriate, considering the story of his life! Maybe his parents were hoping a troublemaker somewhere would take rise up against injustice and the corrupt authority that perpetuated it. No matter what their purpose was, I think naming a child something like that is tempting fate. And in their case, fate delivered big time!
On a more lighthearted note, this question made me think of something. I think "Smooth" would be a really witty boy middle name. Then once he grew up he could use the pick-up line, "My middle name is Smooth."
Pretty common names at BYU that I've heard recently include Ewe, Heel Holder, Trap, I Came From a Bee Swarm, and Redhead.
I mean, haven't you heard of Home Ruler Pot Maker and the Sorcerer's Stone? Or Defending-Men and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? What about Close-Shave Tiny Islands and the Hound of the Baskervilles?
Joking aside, we use a lot of names that either used to be or are common English words with negative connotations, or are based in languages such as Hebrew where negative-sounding-when-translated words were given as names even as those words were still in the colloquial speech of the time. Names with meanings like warrior are common (Finn is one of them), people actually name their kids things like Danger* or Storm, and old names like Gay have taken on new meanings in society that a lot of people still consider to be negative.
Now, even though I've talked about Western naming traditions, naming traditions are complex, and I'm not about to go into an in-depth research project on how the Xhosa speakers do it. But a quick Google search tells me that naming ceremonies and given names are important to Xhosa speakers. In Xhosa, names are, as Sheebs surmises, often hopes for what that child can achieve, but negative names are less common and those with negative names usually go by a non-Xhosa name ASAP. In Nelson Mandela's Wikipedia biography, it says that he went by Nelson or the family name Madiba for most of his life. He was named by his father according to NelsonMandela.org, and Wikipedia says that his polygamist father was proud and had a "stubborn sense of fairness." While we cannot guess at why Mandela's father named him the colloquial equivalent of "Troublemaker," and while we don't know for sure if it has a negative connotation in Xhosa or if it was meant to be positive or driving, we can surmise that Nelson Mandela did grow to be proud of it as it is widely known as one of his many names.
-Yog in Neverland
*Yes, often as a middle name. Welcome to the new age, where our jokes become reality.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
What is your favorite joke (or running gag) in your field of study?
-Mico, who will never tire of wug jokes
A pianist and singer are rehearsing "Autumn Leaves" for a concert and the pianist says:
"OK. We will start in G minor and then on the third bar, modulate to B major and go into 5/4. When you get to the bridge, modulate back down to F# minor and alternate a 4/4 bar with a 7/4 bar. On the last A section go into double time and slowly modulate back to G minor."
The singer says: "Wow, I don't think I can remember all of that."
The pianist says: "Well, that's what you did last time."
Q: What does new age music sound like played backwards?
A: New age music.
I'm a linguist. I like ambiguity more than most people.
-Owlet, also a fan of wugs
My salary. Ba-dum-TSH.
-Ms.O'Malley, elementary educator
Ending any sentence by throwing your fist in the air and yelling "Journalism!" to make it true.
There are probably lots of jokes and references we make without me noticing much, but none that I can think of off the top of my head.
(Except that we make fun of people who don't believe in evolution often.)
Dear Sheebs, Haleakalā, and any other new writers I'm missing (sorry!),
If you could choose to be asked any question, what would it be? What is your answer to that question?
Thanks and excellent job so far!
P.S. And no, I'm not going to take "The question you are now asking me; the answer I am now giving you" for an answer.
It's hard to say. One of the biggest things I liked about the 100 Hour Board as a reader, and now as a probationary writer, is learning about things I didn't know before. My favorite questions are ones that I wouldn't have otherwise considered. That having been said, I thought about it and came up with one that I wouldn't mind answering. Also, thanks for calling me out! It's always exciting when people notice you.
How did you start reading the 100 Hour Board?
A few days before I arrived at BYU, (I'm not from Utah) I decided I wanted to plan everything out as much as possible. I was moving away from home, and gosh darn it, I was going to be an adult. (As you can probably imagine, all my plans fell apart 2.7 seconds after I got here.) I started reading everything I could find out about BYU so I could plan everything I would do in unnecessary detail.
At the time, the 100 Hour Board was still partnered with the Daily Universe, (now just the Universe) and the Daily Universe website had a link to the 100 Hour Board on it. "Your Questions, Our Answers." The first thing I noticed was that it was hilarious! The second thing I noticed was that it was incredibly useful. I submitted a question to help me make my excessive plans, and the writers at the time responded to the probably very stupid question very kindly.
Ever since then, it's been fun to read. And I have since learned that being an adult does not mean excessively over-planning everything. I have also learned that if it did, I would never fully arrive at adulthood.
Who are your role models/mentors? Why?
Few things make me feel happier than thinking about the people that I look up to and aspire to be like. Here is a list of some of them:
1. My not-my-actual-but-almost mother. No one else has so consistently been there for me when I have needed someone. Which is really saying something because I'm not exactly the most stable person in the world and I know it takes a lot of patience.
2. My first roommate ever. In the beginning she was constantly invading my physical and emotional bubble. But eventually it didn't feel like invading anymore. That was the start of a big change for me.
3. My YSA bishop at home. He gives of his time freely without resentment or impatience. He always made me feel so loved. Because of him, I try hard to give people as much time as they need, when they need it. I don't know that I always succeed but I am getting better. It's hard to not be stingy with time.
4. My aunt, who is the pioneer of our family in many aspects of life.
5. My favorite professor here at BYU. He has had a big impact on the way I think interpersonal relationships should be. Before I was very confused about the desire I felt for closeness with others because my personal ideal self was independent and invulnerable. That is... currently in the process of changing. He is definitely not the only person who has influenced me in this respect but he has really helped me to know how to think about it.
6. My roommate from last year. She was so full of genuine optimism that it was contagious. Before living with her, I had pretty much dismissed optimism as being insincere and invalidating. But now I know that it is not what I thought it was and that there is real power in it.
7. My... I don't know what to call her exactly. Someone I know who has overcome real difficulty who has since dedicated her life to empathizing with, caring about, and lifting up other people. I am consistently in awe of the warmth and love she radiates. She is perhaps my greatest (earthly) example.
Thanks for giving me permission to gush and be super mushy. I'll finish now.
What are some of your favorite things?
Besides raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, here are a few of my favorite things:
Favorite book: Of all time, it's definitely the Harry Potter series. The Goblet of Fire is my favorite of the favorites. Of books I've read recently, The Glass Castle: A Memoir by Jeannette Walls is at the top of the list.
Favorite movie: Lilo and Stitch. I could watch this movie every single day and it would never get old.
Favorite BQ: Any of the HFAC experiments, but Board Question #41925 is definitely my favorite. I don't even know how I would react if I saw someone driving around Provo while holding hamburgers out of their windows.
Favorite band: Maroon 5 all the way. Justin Timberlake is a close second. I also really like Fall Out Boy but it's a recent conversion so they're not quite at the top yet.
Favorite types of questions: I consider myself the resident child development and elementary education specialist. I'm all over any questions relating to that!
Favorite place to be: The beach. My parents were thinking of moving this summer and I tried to convince them to buy a beach house. I'm pretty sure the number one reason why they didn't buy a house closer to the ocean is because they were scared I would move back in with them and never move out. I'm not saying I would have, but it definitely crossed my mind!
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Why must we be baptized by immersion? Yes, I understand we are following the example of Christ, but there are other ordinances/practices done in the church where only a symbolic representation is sufficient. What makes baptism different?
- Procrastinating my paper on the early Reformation
Dear Procrasti Nation,
Baptism isn't different.
Like all ordinances, baptism is symbolic of the covenant you're making. You don't literally die and come back to life during baptism, do you? Because of this imagery and also divine commandments, we are baptized in what we believe to be the correct way (by immersion). The water itself doesn't do anything, nor does getting dunked under it, but rather, our following of exact commandments to perform the ordinance in a beautifully symbolic way helps us make and remember this covenant.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Watch this: www.youtube.com/watch?v=NegJ4Ab1tjE I want this song, no I need this song, I MUST have it. There's only one problem. I can't find the MP3 anywhere. The closest I got was finding the CD it's found on on sale for just $50!!! Don't get me wrong, it's a great song but I'm not paying $50 for it. Could any of you with your internet super power skills find if there is somewhere else I can buy this song at a more affordable price? If not could you explain to me why it is so ridiculously overpriced? Gracias!
I was trying to find the song by that group, but my searching skills were limited since I'm not fluent in Spanish or, interestingly, Russian. My elementary Spanish vocabulary tells me the song title has the 'green' in it, but Google Translate tells me the Russian in the drop-down box calls it "Sleepwalking Romance" and it's from the movie Flamenco by Carlos Saura. Here is a list of all the songs on the soundtrack but I didn't see your song on it or recognize any photos of the credited singers.
The song is probably harder to find and more expensive because it was produced in Spain over a decade ago and it didn't have stellar profits. In addition, the summaries I have read basically said it was like a Spanish version of Riverdance so it appealed to a smaller, select group of people rather than the general public.
Wow, I love this poem, and I had no idea there was such a good song version of it. I will stay on the lookout and comment if I get any better leads than O'Malley (I doubt it... but I can dream).
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Does a girl's height matter to guys? As far as I can tell the general preference is that guys prefer girls who are shorter than them and that some of the taller guys don't like to date really, really short girls. Is that so? Are there other preferences? Also, does height matter in whether someone stands out in a crowd? I think tall girls would stand out a lot more, but I don't know if that would necessarily be in a good way.
For a long time, I had a strong preference for girls who were slightly shorter than me. That has changed; I am now dating a girl who's about an inch or two taller than me and I love it. In more general hypothetical terms, I honestly can't say that I have a strong preference for height or lack thereof, except that it might be a bit weird (but not dealbreaker-level weird) to date a girl who was unusually tall or significantly taller than me.
I have some bad news and some good news! The bad news: each boy has their own preference, and for most guys it doesn't really matter what other guys think. The good news: each boy has their own preference, and it often changes over time one way or the other.
My husband, for example, is a tall guy who dated some really short girls (think over six feet dating some barely-five-footers). He, in fact, was convinced he would only ever be in relationships with short girls because he liked them short. Now he's married to a woman who is 5'10, or 6'3 in a really good pair of heels. Whoa!
Another friend of mine, to show another side of things, is about 5'7 and feels uncomfortable around girls taller than him, so he dates exclusively 5'7 and under girls almost out of subconscious habit, and that probably won't change. Does that mean he's missed out on someone great? If you thought that, you'd have to meet his amazing, just-under-his-height girlfriend and tell that to her face.
And because witnesses come in threes (or something like that), my last example is of my crazy (CRAZY) 5'3 uncle who, after a failed marriage to a woman shorter than him, found a lady crazier than him and married her, despite their height difference of about 10 inches... with her being the taller one, and a huge fan of super-high heels. My dad was having a hard day with the photos or something, because all the pictures we have of their wedding have all of him and her from about half her breasts downward. And crazy though they may be (and nothing to aspire to), they are pretty darn happy together.
Lastly, I was one of those awkward tall teenage girls who was really uncomfortable with my height. I slouched, I felt like a big giant a lot, and generally felt out of place and jealous of short girls. But then I met this 4'11 girl who went on dates with 6'10 guys and 5'4 guys without batting an eye, and for some reason her shortness made me finally accept my tallness. I realized that if I just stopped caring about what boys thought of my height, I could have a lot more fun in life and in dating. And guess what? I felt confident, and apparently that confidence convinced at least five guys shorter than me to ask me on dates, one of those to try to date me (but he made fun of Asians for their "squinty eyes" so, sorry dude), one exactly-my-height boy to feel comfortable dating me even when I wore heels on dates a lot, and a large handful of tall dudes to convince me that I liked crazy tall enough to marry a guy almost a foot taller than me. Stand tall (or short!) no matter what your size, girl. It doesn't matter what guys like, in the end. Because really, anybody who discounts you based on your genetic, unchangeable features isn't worth dating to begin with.
-Yog in Neverland
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Before you read the next paragraph: How many Board questioners do you know by pseudonym?
I just realized there are a lot more recurring 'nyms than I thought. On a hunch i searched for Zwerg Zwei in the archives (it sounded conspicuous, or maybe it was locked up deep in my memory), and I found you, Zwerg! That got me excited to learn more about the recurring questioners just like I do with the answerers. Just a quick search of some of the recent questions also revealed Rainbow Connection, pregunton, and Marlsven. So who is so prevalent that you remember them, and what do you know about them off the top of your head?
I remember you! You sent me an article about owls.
I know Ardilla Feroz in person, but werf doesn't know I'm Owlet. Anglophile, I believe, has many of the same interests as I do. When I first started writing, I answered a lot of questions from Internaut, whom I think is (or was) in high school. Ummm...I never really thought about this before, but I suppose I'm good at remembering who asks a lot of questions but not what their questions are about. I also have a few friends that read the Board, but I don't know if they have reader 'nyms, and sometimes that drives me crazy with curiosity.
I know some 'nyms from the Boardboard, but not very well.
Off the top of my head...
I don't know any of the regular questioners in person or by real name, but here are the bits of knowledge I have about a few 'nyms.
I know that Banana Mama is reading Lolita but doesn't want to admit it, sci-grrrl asks questions about TV shows a lot, Vorpal asks questions about topics being discussed on the Boardboard, and El Jirafa Anonima asks questions that I typically really enjoy answering.
I could probably get way more if I could just glance at the archives to spark my memory, but off the top of my head, that's all I've got.
And you sent me a really nice email once! It made my day, so thanks!
You wrote me a poem and I cried from sheer joy and completely mucked up a halfway decent response, for which I apologize.
I know a bunch of reader 'nyms, but if you asked me anything about them, I know nothing, other than that I really like Vorpal's questions and want to give him a serious response. Unfortunately, I can always see both sides of an argument and I feel compelled to seriously consider and argue the merits of both sides and then I just end up wholly confused.
I also know that every time Portia asks a question I always end up giving her a rubbish response and I should probably stop that and be a decent human being and put some time and effort into responding for once in my life. Sorry Portia!
Dear 100 Hour Board,
In the 2008 remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still, who's the actor who played the part of the soldier telling the drone pilots what to do in the part where the drones are trying to attack Gort, but then Gort takes control of the drones and the drones turn around and crash into the Army tanks, and the guy who I'm trying to place pulls his headset off angrily. He looks familiar and I'm trying to figure out what else I've seen him in. A comedy? He has kind of a funny looking face.
After watching the scene and comparing it to the casting list on IMDb, I've determined that it's Robert Knepper. He has a pretty long filmography, but most of his credits are in action and crime movies, not comedies. My roommate and I tried to play a game of "Who Does This Guy Look Like?" but she was stumped and I was thrown off by the furry caterpillar on his face (seriously...my guesses included Tom Selleck and Freddie Mercury). Maybe you'll remember where you've seen him once you check out the movies he has been in.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
I'm trying to find a particular gift for Christmas, but alas, my google skills are too weak. When I was a kid I remember having a coin sorter that used a series of see-saw like levers to sort coins based on their weight. It was about the same dimensions as a connect-4 game stand, with the front and back being clear plastic with a series of colorful levers suspended in between the two panes. You would drop a coin in the top corner, then it would roll down the series of levers based on what type of coin then drop into the appropriate coin roll.
I've tried every major retailer, Google, Amazon, and various other sources, maybe I'm just not searching for it right. If I knew the brand or something that would probably help.
Anyway you can help me find the novelty coin sorter?
-Former student with too much loose change
One of the things I love about writing for the Board is being able to use my magical Internet skills to help other people.
I'm fairly certain this is what you're looking for:
Unfortunately, they are no longer being produced. You'll have to find them on websites like eBay or Etsy. Here's a blue one for sale that I found by searching 'Mag Nif vintage coin sorter'. You can also get in touch with Mag Nif, the company that created them, by emailing them at info(at)magnif.com. They may be able to direct you to a store that sells them.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Is it even likely that a bunch of Americans petitioning for this will change anything in another country? Also, are the petitioners asking for a fair trial and for him to be punished to the full extent their laws will allow for animal abuse? I just want to be sure that's what it's saying...
that made me sad
After reading the petition, I have a couple thoughts. First, the site isn't a US-exclusive program. Actually, scanning through the comments, I'd guess that about a third of them came from the UK. That said, I could only find one or two comments from anywhere other than the US, Canada, western Europe, or South Korea. On the other hand, it's quite possible that the purpose of this petition is simply to bring the issue to the attention of the authorities, regardless of who the impetus is coming from.
Will this have any results? I don't have a clue. I tend to be skeptical of anything involving internet petitions, and while Chile's justice system is better than that of many Latin American countries, it still leaves something to be desired. I certainly hope that something will be done, in any case.
I think the petition says what you think it says.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Question #75434 made me curious, can students check out 50 Shades of Gray from the BYU library? I'd definitely consider this a trashy romance novel, but considering it's popularity I thought I'd ask.
-Not a BYU student or I'd go look myself
Hah. Hah. Hahahahahahahahahahaha.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
Why do eraser crumbs melt into my plastic protractor and triangle? It's a HI-POLYMER eraser, and the clear plastic protractor and triangle are from the Bookstore.
-Sad about now non-smooth triangle
Dear owner of sad, misshapen plastic triangle,
You are not alone! A quick google search showed me that tons of people have had similar experiences of plastic things being destroyed by erasers.
The reason why this happens is that both rubber and plastic erasers have substances called plasticizers added to them in manufacturing. Plasticizers work by creating more space between the polymers, which reduces the cohesion (stickiness) between them. The observable effect of this is that the material becomes more malleable and less brittle at a lower temperature than would be required without the plasticizer.
When your eraser bits and their plasticizer came into contact with your triangle, the temperature at which the triangle became malleable lowered to room temperature or lower. This then enabled the crumbs to melt into it.
Dear 100 Hour Board,
My phone contract with AT&T is up soon. I plan on renewing but I don't want to upgrade my phone yet. Can I save my upgrade? I have an iPhone 4S that works great. The 5s doesn't really impress me but I have heard a lot of mac rumors that the 6 will be out during the summer of 2014. It sounds like it will be a great phone. Would AT&T let me wait to upgrade my phone then (and have it be the same upgrade price discount)? Or do I lose out on my upgrade if I don't upgrade when I renew my contract?
Dear Steve Careers,
It can be hard to say, because wireless carriers typically bury information about this deep inside the fine print of contract terms.
However, if you chose to renew your contract with AT&T, you generally will not be able to save your upgrade to use at a later time. Most carriers begin offering subsidized pricing (but not a full upgrade) after 6 months, and a full upgrade after 24. So you would need to wait another 6 months for a discount, and 24 months for an upgrade.
That having been said, remember you're under no obligation to renew your contract right away. In most cases, you can continue as a customer of a wireless carrier after your contract expires under the same terms you had before. There are some exceptions to this. For example, if you've been grandfathered into a plan that has already ended, you may need to renew your contract right away. However, in most cases, you can continue as a month-to-month subscriber. Then, you can just renew your two year contract when the iPhone 6 comes out.
If you want to be really sure (and I would be), I would call and confirm your plan with someone at AT&T. If any reader has had ever saved an upgrade after renewing a contract with AT&T, feel free to submit a comment.
On an unrelated note, seriously? How on earth are we talking about iPhone 6 rumors already? A few days ago, Macrumors announced their iPhone 6 roundup page, and it was all I could do to stop myself from giving the eye roll of the century.
Anyway, best of luck!
You're a Redditor? Cool! What subreddits do you frequent?
I cruise a lot of them randomly, but I like Ask Reddit, TIL, advice animals, best of, jokes, and my absolute favorite is cringepics. It makes me feel so much better about my life. Unexpected is another good one...honestly, there are a ton of subreddits that are right up my alley and I hop around on a lot of them. I just spent way too much time on Reddit in general...